Randy Cantrell

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Dissect anything and you’ll discover some important things and many insignificant things. That includes selling.

I don’t necessarily have sales DNA, but I’ve got a lifetime of sales experience so it sometimes feels like it’s DNA. Oh, and I’m naturally introverted. And there’s this – I do not think “salesman” is a derogatory label. I rather think selling can be noble (or not), like most things.

Simply put, selling is dialogue with a purpose. Ideally, the purpose is to serve the customer with something highly valuable. Valuable enough to warrant an exchange of money. Valuable enough that the amount of money paid by the customer is equal or less than the benefit they get from the thing. Valuable enough that the amount enables the provider (the seller) with the sustained ability to continue to deliver the value to customers now and in the future.

Dialogue is the keyword. Selling is a conversation. A give and take. Questions and answers. Understanding. Learning.

Selling is a dozen little things. Because it’s a conversation between two or more people it’s entirely focused on communication.

And this is where your impatience can wreck things. You begin to take shortcuts. You neglect the vital elements of human connection because you can’t help yourself. You need to make a sale. You want to make a sale. You grow fixated on what you want and forget the purpose of the dialogue – to serve the customer!

Do you have people in your life who call you and all you have to do is answer your phone…then they’re off to the races with what they want to say? Barely coming up for air?

Ten minutes into the conversation – well, to be accurate, it’s not a conversation…it’s a monologue – you’ve only said one word, “Hello.” Selling is a dialogue, not a monologue.

That person who calls you and dominates the conversation isn’t interested in hearing what you’ve got to say. They’re just looking for somebody who will endure listening to them. Do you really think your prospect is willing to endure that from you? Don’t kid yourself. It’s not about you. It’s about them. It’s only about you in the context of what’s in it for them. Remember the value exchange, the purpose of the dialogue.

Impatience can make you neglect all the little things necessary to give the prospect the opportunity to take advantage of your offer. Your brain kicks into a different place when you’re impatient. It defies logic and reason thinking, “The more I talk the more I’m likely to persuade them.” You get sucked into thinking that the blitzkrieg of information is the path to hearing them say, “Yes.” The moment just gets too big for some people because they’re selfish.

How can we harness our impatience when we’re selling?

One, remember the purpose.

To serve the customer. Period. Get that emblazoned on your brain before you enter the dialogue. Keep it there. It’s the bedrock of everything else you do.

Two, leverage the purpose to drive the conversation.

Think of your closest friends or family members. Do they show interest in you? Yep. These people are genuinely interested in you and what’s going on with you. Plus, they’re genuinely interested in how they can help you. And you feel the same toward them.

Go into the sales conversation focused on the prospect. Be interested in them and in helping them. Avoid being presumptuous. “I’ve got the ideal solution for you,” is a presumption I’ve heard millions of times. Mostly from people who never asked me a single question. People who lacked any context to me or my business.

Use the conversation for context.

Three, be honest and direct.

I’m not sure if any business activity has more tactics or strategies. There are so many books, seminars, podcasts, trainers and speakers on the subject of selling…I don’t suppose we’ll ever hit a limit on them because somebody is always coming up with some new angle, new strategies, and tactics.

True confession: I’m not a sales tactic guy. I understand them. I know they can work. And I know we can talk people into or manipulate people. I’m not interested because I’ve always been a longterm player. I’m not transactional. There are very skilled transactional salespeople out there who are masters at acts of persuasion. They work every interaction to their advantage and are able to get a fair number of people to say, “Yes.” They’re like sales magicians.

I choose honesty. Directness.

Does it work every time? No. Nothing works every time. But here’s my sales pitch for honesty and directness. It feels right. I can hang up a phone, or walk out of an office or conference room without regret. And I can know that I attempted to fulfill my purpose for the dialogue – to serve them. It’s completely their right to reject my offer to serve them, but they don’t get to decide or influence my willingness to fulfill my goal. I’m in control of my willingness to serve them.

For example, I’ve had conversations with people who I honestly didn’t think would benefit from my services. I’ve looked people in the eyes and said, “I appreciate the opportunity to learn more about you and your company, and to share with you what I do and how I do it, but I think there are likely better choices for you.” It’s not a tactic. It’s the truth, as I believe it, based on what I’ve learned during our conversation.

A prospect asks about the timeframe for the work. The salesperson, anxious to land the deal, overpromises, knowing full well that the timeframe can’t be met, but is hopeful once the deal is done that he can work things out. Impatience is at work.

Directness might offer a different conversation. “I understand your timeframe is compressed. I’m confident that our team, working with your team, can expedite the execution of this project. I don’t want to make any promises I can’t keep, but we’re prepared to commit ourselves and our resources to deliver the best outcome, but I want to make sure you know that we may not be able to hit that target date. Something that we’re not even considering could come up and bite us. I’d rather be honest with you and lose this opportunity than lie to you and get it.”

Tacticians will criticize. Let ’em. Deals built on hiding the truth or on lack of directness can cause more fretfulness than just about anything. I’ve been at this for decades and my own point of view is simple – it’s NOT WORTH IT. I can feel good about losing a deal because I was candid, honest and direct. I always feel bad when I get a deal because I wasn’t. So I don’t do it anymore. Truth is, I haven’t done it for many, many years. Thankfully, I learned that lesson pretty early in my career.

Four, do what you say when you say.

I have no idea why this is so hard except to know that impatience (selfishness) is at the heart of it.

People don’t call when they say they will. They don’t do many things they claim they’ll do. Or when they say they will.

Why commit to it then? Go back to the third thing – be honest and direct. “I’ll get that to you as soon as I’m able. It may be next week before I’m able to do that. Will that be okay?” That’s infinitely better than, “I’ll have that to you by tomorrow morning.” Then, you don’t.

Impatience hems us into committing to things because we think if we don’t, the prospect or customer will boot us. No wonder so many customers are dissatisfied and unhappy with their experience.

Make commitments carefully. Follow through on them. 

Better to live by honesty and directness than to promise things you may not be able to do.

Consider what you say to prospects and customers as promises. So many times people don’t view them as the commitments they truly are. Big mistake.

Five, be gracious and thankful.

Impatience fuels a lack of gratitude. Resist.

Everybody enjoys being appreciated. Especially the people who give us their time and attention to have the conversation. Politeness and manners. It’s always appropriate to have them and use them. You’re without excuse if you neglect them. And I don’t care how rude or obnoxious the prospect may be. You’re not in control of their behavior. You control YOU. Do the right thing no matter what. All the time.

Opportunities don’t guarantee success. Or failure. All we can do is our best.

You’ll lose more than you’ll win, but that’s okay. The point is to get enough wins to keep playing. Stay in the game. Figure out how to win more often, even if it’s just a marginal improvement. Keep growing. Keep improving. Embrace the positive qualities necessary to fulfill the purpose of the conversations – to serve! Push your impatience aside because it won’t help you. And here’s a truth I find helpful.

Someone is waiting for you to show up to help them. Your job is to be persistent enough to find them.

Be well. Do good. Grow great!

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 11:54 — 11.4MB)

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Happy Monday! This may be a short week for the podcast. I’ve got a hectic schedule starting Wednesday morning – through the rest of the week. But we’ll see how it goes. I’m just forwarning you so you don’t panic if you don’t hear from me after tomorrow. But for now, let’s kick this week off with a focus on what we DON’T need.

There are many things we don’t need, but perhaps the last thing we need…or the thing we most don’t need is another person telling us what to do.

Here’s the thing, and you hear me say it constantly…because it’s just true. You’ll figure it out. YOU will figure it out. Sometimes people think that means they have to go it alone, but that’s not it at all. Quite the contrary. We need the help of other people as we operate our business. We just need the right people. People who can help us figure it out, NOT people who try to figure it out for us!

Why are these the last people we need? Because they’re not helpful. They can be toxic.

Let me clarify. Sometimes we ask people, “What should I do?” And sometimes we really mean it. Other times, we don’t. We’re just looking for an easy answer.

Here’s the thing. Most people who are advice givers are prone to do it without context. They’re selfish. It’s not about you, but it’s about them. They’re smarter than you. Or think they are. But just because somebody gives us advice doesn’t make them a purebred advice giver.

Frequently, I’m asked, “What do you think I should do?” I can give advice as much as the next guy, but I need context before I’m willing to even consider doing it. That means I ask a ton of questions. My goal is to avoid “telling,” choosing rather to help the person see more clearly for themselves what they should.

Exceptions. There are always some. Harmful behavior. Illegal behavior. Unethical behavior. Immoral behavior.

Even these exceptions demand a bit of an explanation though. Not everybody wants or will accept advice when they’re behaving poorly. What do we do? I’m not a fan of looking the other way. To warn people that they’re going down a dangerous path isn’t the same thing as telling somebody what to do. We want to help people we care about, the people we love. None of want to sit idly by and watch people hurt themselves or others. Sometimes we need to intervene. This episode isn’t about how to go about that, but I don’t want any of us to feel bad for trying to extend that kind of help. And I don’t want us to hesitate thinking it’s the last thing these people need. No, they need somebody courageous enough to help them and warn them. We all need correction sometimes.

It’s hard enough for us to change ourselves. It’s impossible for us to change anybody else, but it’s possible for us to help them see their need to change. So when we’re faced with friends or family or coworkers who are behaving poorly…I think we have a responsibility to serve them well. They have to decide for themselves. As we all do.

Okay, back to the point of today’s episode – which basically is the truth that we all have to figure it out, but others can help us do that better and faster!

Giving advice.

Every leader does it. We should. But that isn’t necessarily (or always) the same as telling people what to do. But sometimes it is.

You’ve got an employee who isn’t cutting it. Their job is now on the line. If they don’t improve, they’ll most certainly be terminated. Should you tell them what to do to improve so they can keep their job? Absolutely! You owe it to them. Further, you owe them candor – sincere honesty. Be as clear as you possibly can because the stakes are high. Your position of leadership gives you a perspective where you know exactly what improvements must be made. Tell them. Just remember, it’s up to them to do it. You’ll have to hold them accountable for the decision they make, but it’s their responsibility to accept or reject your advice.

As leaders, we have to read every situation for what it really is. That employee at risk of losing their job is not the same as one of our direct reports coming to us for advice about a particular problem they’re facing. Suppose a VP comes to you one morning wondering what she should do about some business challenge. You may be tempted to dive directly into advice giver mode. Resist. Instead, assume the role of mentor and coach. Take aim at helping this VP figure it out for herself. Ask questions. Ask the VP how she feels about the answers she’s giving or the questions you’re asking. Be a trusted sounding board for her.

Autocratic and tyrannical leaders will use such sessions to exert their power. For them, the hierarchy is the only thing that matters. Mostly, that everybody realizes they’re at the top of that hierarchy. But those leaders aren’t listening to me! 😀

You want to grow as an evidence-based leader. Evidence-based leaders resist the urge to jump to conclusions or assumptions that have no basis. Practice digging a bit to better understand the situation and the context. By doing that, you’ll be demonstrating to others how they can also incorporate that behavior into their own leadership. It’s the solid path toward growth and improvement.

Taking advice. Or resisting it.

As I said earlier, some people are just quick to say, “Well, I’ll tell you what you should do!” Since we’re talking about refraining from telling people what to do I’m going to break the rule by urging you to limit your interactions with these people as much as possible. Their judgment and constant advice giving just isn’t helpful. They’re not helping you grow or learn anything. They’re selfish and using you as a platform for there self-perceived brilliance. I’m not a fan of giving people like that any extra oxygen. Do as you please.

We embrace what we own. 

If I decide I’m going to drop 20 pounds, I’m more likely to accomplish that feat. If you ride me about how I need to lose weight and you’re constantly telling me why I should do it – even if your reasoning and logic are spot on – I’m not likely going to lean into that decision because I don’t own it. And your nagging me may compel me to reject it, even though I know it’s best for me. Proof that we’re not always (sometimes, not even often) logical.

Instead, you could share with me a story about your own journey. Not in some narcissistic way to make sure the spotlight is always on you, but in a way to show your own vulnerabilities. You might tell me about going to the doctor earlier in the year and discovering that some of your numbers were elevated. Blood pressure, blood sugar, bad cholesterol, etc. So the doctor pushed you to drop some weight. You signed up at a local gym and began going twice a week. Within a month you were going 3 times a week. Now, more often than not you go 4 times a week. You dropped 25 pounds, stopped snoring and feel better than you’ve felt in years. Oh, and those elevated numbers are all down well within the healthy range. As you’re sharing this with me I’m thinking of myself. And likely telling myself, “You should do this.”

Hearing you extol the benefits and sharing the details of how you altered your diet, along with reasonable exercise – not marathon gym sessions – I’m thinking what may be possible for me. I won’t think that way if you’re harping at me, or telling me what to do.

Here’s the big elephant in the room. CEOs and entrepreneurs are very independent. We don’t enjoy being told what to do. By anybody. Especially when we didn’t ask for it.

But we’re lifelong learners who enjoy being pushed. We love the competition. Especially with ourselves.

Questions help us. We need people in our lives willing to ask us tough questions. Not to embarrass us or put us on the spot, but to make us defend our actions, behaviors and choices. Those compassionate challenging questions provoke us to stretch, learn and grow. In short, they help us figure it out.

Learn how to do it for others. Learn how to do it for yourself.

Be well. Do good. Grow great!

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 22:31 — 21.0MB)

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Happy Saturday! Warning: I’m fixing to make you an offer. Well, it may be an offer for you. It depends on who you are. Along the way, I’m going to provoke you to think and perhaps consider some new ideas. I hope you find it useful.

I’m currently looking for U.S. based business owners who are prepared to take their business and their leadership to whole new heights…to join me inside The Peer Advantage by Bula Network. Quite simply, The Peer Advantage by Bula Network is a 7-member peer advisory group – a mastermind group, if you please. Seven entrepreneurs together with me serving as the smart guide. People willing to join forces to help each other grow their businesses by sharing experiences, insights, questions, and answers.

You can find out all the details by visiting ThePeerAdvantage.com.

But today I want to focus on why this is the world’s best opportunity for entrepreneurs to grow.

Growth is popular to claim. Easy to say that we want, but much tougher to accomplish…because it’s not easy. Or comfortable. And we want to be comfortable, then when we are comfortable we want to remain comfortable.

There are 2 basic forces involved in this world’s best opportunity for entrepreneurs to grow. They’re PERSPECTIVE and POWER. Both involve our willingness to embrace – I mean fully embrace – the service, support, and help of others. Let’s talk about them.

PERSPECTIVE.

Here’s a story you may or may not have heard. Listen carefully.

Once upon a time, there lived six blind men in a village. One day the villagers told them, “Hey, there is an elephant in the village today.”

They had no idea what an elephant is. They decided, “Even though we would not be able to see it, let us go and feel it anyway.” All of them went where the elephant was. Every one of them touched the elephant.

“Hey, the elephant is a pillar,” said the first man who touched his leg.

“Oh, no! it is like a rope,” said the second man who touched the tail.

“Oh, no! it is like a thick branch of a tree,” said the third man who touched the trunk of the elephant.

“It is like a big hand fan,” said the fourth man who touched the ear of the elephant.

“It is like a huge wall,” said the fifth man who touched the belly of the elephant.

“It is like a solid pipe,” Said the sixth man who touched the tusk of the elephant.

They began to argue about the elephant and every one of them insisted that he was right. It looked like they were getting agitated. A wise man was passing by and he saw this. He stopped and asked them, “What is the matter?” They said, “We cannot agree to what the elephant is like.” Each one of them told what he thought the elephant was like. The wise man calmly explained to them, “All of you are right. The reason every one of you is telling it differently because each one of you touched the different part of the elephant. So, actually, the elephant has all those features what you all said.”

“Oh!” everyone said. There was no more fight. They felt happy that they were all right.

The moral of the story is that there may be some truth to what someone says. Sometimes we can see that truth and sometimes not because they may have a different perspective which we may not agree with. So, rather than arguing like the blind men, we should think, “Maybe they have their reasons. I should find out more.” This way we don’t get in arguments. This allows us to derive benefit from people with different viewpoints and perspective.

Six blind men, with combined perspectives, got it right. By themselves, they only had a single perspective that didn’t accurately represent reality.

Entrepreneurs don’t grow based on illusion or delusion. We need reality. We need clarity. We need accuracy. To get that, we need the help of others. We need their perspectives. Not to make up our minds for us, but to help us see things as they truly are so we can make up minds with much better information. Result? Much better decisions. Coupled with much faster speed because as we’re benefiting from the perspective of others we’re vastly accelerating the decision-making process.

Another illustration is useful. It’s Plato’s allegory of the cave.

It begins with a scene painted of a group of prisoners who have lived chained to the wall of a dark cave their entire lives.

Every day the people in the cave watch shadows projected on a blank wall in front of them. The shadows are real and shape their entire reality. It’s their only viewpoint.

Now imagine that one of the prisoners leaves the cave and walks outside into the sunshine. For the first time in his life, he’s exposed to life outside the cave. He can now finally see the true forms and shapes of the shadows he thought were real. The allegory poses the question, “What would he think of his companions back in the cave?” He’d probably feel sorry for them and their limited reality because he now knows things they don’t.

If he returned back to the cave and told them about what he saw, they’d likely laugh at him and think he was crazy. Plato’s Allegory of the Cave explores the tension between the imagined reality that we think is real (shadows) versus the reality that is the truth (outside the cave). For our purposes today, it illustrates how a single viewpoint can limit our understanding and ability to see reality. Perspective is empowering when it’s expanded. It’s limiting when it’s restricted.

POWER.

Force is positive. Sure, it can also be negative, but I’m thinking of it more like LIFE-force. Forces for good. We need forces in our lives. Power that pushes us. Without, we devolve into lives of low character, crime, and other awful, selfish behavior. Think of this as power “on demand,” like the accelerator of your car.

Power is energy. The energy to propel us forward. No power, no forward progress or momentum.

There are two basic forms of power: internal and external. Both can be influenced internally and externally. Let me explain.

Motivation is a word you hear all the time. As in Matt Foley, Motivational Speaker. 😀

Well, I don’t think there is such a thing as a motivational speaker. Not really. They’re more accurately inspirational speakers. They inspire.

Motivation is the energy you bring to get the work done. It’s your internal energy or power. Some people can’t find the energy to get out of bed. They’re unmotivated. You can do whatever you want, say whatever you want…but until the person makes up their own mind to get out of bed, they’ll lay there all day.

Somebody may be able to supply a degree of power (or energy) in the form of inspiration. It may spark something inside them, but it’s not true power – not the kind of power required to get them out of bed. Only they can supply that.

External power can also happen in the context of seeing how we fit in a community or group. For example, professional athletes get traded in every sport. They leave one team to join a new one. When they enter the locker room of the new team they have to figure out – with the help of the coaching staff – where they fit. But the coaching staff won’t likely have the biggest impact on “fit.” The other players will. The “room” (in this case, the locker room) is more important than any single player in a team sport because a single player – no matter how impactful he may be – can’t determine the destiny of the team. This new player will get a sense of the culture of the group and he’ll have to figure out his place within the context of the team. High achievers will embrace the influences (the power exerted by others, especially the existing leadership) so they can quickly contribute. They’ll use that energy for their own individual performance and for their ability to contribute to the team’s performance.

It’s interesting to see players who may have struggled in one environment – on one team – move to a new team where their performance soars. What happened? Did they suddenly gain skills they lacked? Of course not. That change of “rooms” presented them with a new force – a new power and energy. They used it to their advantage and decided they’d lean into the new energy.

Everybody benefits from PERSPECTIVE and POWER, especially entrepreneurs who are so accustomed to going it alone. 

As business owners, we’re surrounded by people. We can be with other people and still be lonely because there are many things we’re unable to share with people inside our company. And there are things we don’t want to share with anybody outside our company either. Mostly because the people in our lives are people to whom we’re connected in some way.

Employees see us as the boss. They mostly want to keep us happy. It’s unfair of us to burden them with our challenges anyway. Besides, they can’t relate to our problems. Even if they’re part of our leadership team we’re not likely going to rely on them for everything that hits our plate. Some decisions are best left to our solitude. It’s how we live.

Outside professionals are mostly people who have us as a client. Suppliers. Vendors. Service professionals. Sure, we solicit them for specific challenges. If I’m bogged down on negotiating a new lease I’m not making a move without my real estate attorney who specializes with such things. But if I’m considering merging with another company, I’m not going to trust him…or anybody else until I get more than ankle deep into the decision.

Who do I lean on during that period of time when I’m sticking my toe in the water until I get ankle deep? Nobody. Likely. I’m going to wrestle with it alone.

The loneliness isn’t defined as literal solitude necessarily. We may talk with a number of people. Maybe our spouse. Maybe a close friend. Maybe a therapist. 😉 But we’re still basically going it alone because there’s nobody who can really relate or understand. We’re just flapping our gums to get it off our chest. And if we’re really lucky (which isn’t that often in this regard), people just listen. No, we’re not likely that lucky. These people have opinions. They tell us we shouldn’t do it. Or we should do it. Talk about an uninformed opinion! It’s not helpful.

The World’s Best Opportunity

Here’s the challenge – surrounding ourselves with people who get it, but people who have no vested interest in the outcome. That is, they don’t benefit personally or individually from our decision. So they don’t exert any pressure (power) with a viewpoint (perspective) that seeks its own welfare. They simply are there to serve us to help us think through it and figure it out for ourselves. Their presence speeds things up significantly because like those blind men, they have a viewpoint worth considering. And they’re bound to have questions that will help us clarify and see things for what they really are – helping us avoid just seeing shadows cast on a wall.

The power of peers is obvious. Everybody is in the same boat of business building. The industry or space doesn’t matter. Business building is business building.

Parents of Murdered Children is a national support group for the poor people who have experienced that awful fate. You don’t want to qualify to join that group, BUT…if you do qualify what better group could you join? Who better to surround you during such a tragic time?

You walk in the room, introduce yourself by simply giving the group your name…and that’s it. That’s the only explanation necessary. You look around the room and realize everybody here “gets it.” They know what you’re feeling. They understand the struggle. Even though their specific experience may be very different, the heart of the connection with the entire group is powerful. The conversations are equally powerful because you’re not having to explain to this group what you may have to try to explain to your closest friends. This group understands it in a way your friends can’t. And THAT is a remarkable help. It’s a level of support and service you can’t get elsewhere.

The Peer Advantage by Bula Network is a level of support and service for business owners. Everybody is a business builder interested in elevating their own performance and the performance of their company. Every member is ready to climb to a higher altitude. And they know that if others are willing and able to help them, then they can get there faster. And they can climb higher.

The details are at ThePeerAdvantage.com, but I don’t respect people who hide things like a bullfighter hiding the sword behind the red cape. Nothing is hidden. So here’s the bottom line…

You’ll be joining a group of 7 entrepreneurs total. I’ll serve as the smart guide, but I’m also a member of the group.

We’ll meet every other week for 2 hours using a video conferencing platform like Zoom.us. You’ll be able to join via your mobile phone, your tablet or your computer.

Each meeting will have a hard start and stop time. We’ll hit the ground running every session. And we’ll end on time. We’re all busy. This won’t be a time waster.

Along the way, we’ll also have some live and recorded webinars to help the group learn new skills, whatever the group wants. We’ll leverage experts who can share their knowledge and insights with us. You won’t have to attend these live, but some will be live. They’ll all be available to you when it’s convenient for you.

The group will be comprised of business owners from around the U.S. They’ll be in a variety of industries and markets. That diversity will help us leverage the power of perspective.

Between our group sessions, we’ll use communication tools as needed. Expect some strong relationships to be forged.

The sessions will not be judgmental, filled with a circle of people who regularly use words like “should” or “shouldn’t.” As in, “You should do this” or “You shouldn’t do that.” Instead, it’ll be filled with people willing to ask questions so they can better understand and help you better understand. It’ll be filled with people willing to push you in the most caring way because they know why you’re there — for the same reason they’re there. To grow, improve and transform. They want to see you soar. They want to soar.

It’s reciprocal. Have you ever helped somebody and felt like you received as much, or more help, than they did? That’s how it works. So whether we’re in the “hot seat” with the focus on us or we’re serving somebody else with their challenges or opportunities, we’re using the information to figure out how it can benefit us and our company.

There’s a $1,299 enrollment fee that is non-refundable. Then quarterly membership is $2,697 paid in advance. For the first 90-days, that full amount of $2,697 is fully refundable. That means, if after six 2-hour sessions you don’t find the value high enough, we part friendly and I give you the $2,697 back. But that’s not going to happen. I’m confident you’re going to find this to best deal going – the highest ROI of anything you could possibly do! It’s going to change your life in the most positive ways possible.

Here’s what you need to do right now. Go to BulaNetwork.com/apply and complete that confidential Google form. It’s an application. Complete that and it’ll prompt you and me to jump on the phone together so we can more fully discuss your business. We’ll decide together if this is the right opportunity for you. But I stand by my statement that this is the world’s best opportunity for entrepreneurs to grow!

Be well. Do good. Grow great!

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 10:39 — 10.9MB)

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We have hot buttons. All of us. Things we’re just overly zealous about. For some reason that maybe we don’t even know.

Some business owners are fanatical about employee honesty. They’re paranoid that people are always stealing. They lead and manage based on that assumption.

Some are fanatical about inventory refusing to discount it quickly enough because they over-value it. It impacts how they manage and lead.

Emotions are the bad guy. We all have them and without them, we’re not fully human. Psychopaths don’t display emotions quite like most of us. That’s an extremely negative example. Sociopaths can display extreme emotions. That’s another negative example.

Emotions fuel us. When we have our emotions in sync with reality it’s a great thing. But when our emotions overrun reality and logic, we can encounter problems.

This week a friend and I were talking about some business opportunities and he told me a story. Two people went into business together with very different skills and responsibilities. They appropriately notated what each of them would do, then set about to do it. Less than a year later they were experiencing solid success, but one of the partners began to feel her contributions were worth more than her partner’s. Resentment was setting in. It was an unrealistic emotion. She wasn’t seeing things for what they really were. The truth was, her partner was handling a ton of things that were enabling her to do what she was best at. Without the partner’s contribution, there’s no way the enterprise would have been as successful.

We’ve all got stories of unreasonable behavior in the face of strong evidence. Proof that emotions need some type of regulation.

An entrepreneur is angry with an employee who gave a customer a discount of less than $100 without getting permission first. He goes OFF on the employee and the rest of the staff to make a point. For hours he spends time trying to figure out ways to prevent this from ever happening again. Less than $100 wrecks the entire company for the day. And the owner continues to obsess about a “lack of control.” So it goes when emotions rule the day.

But…

Emotions play a vital role in the establishment and building of our companies. We’re driven to accomplish something. It’s not always rational. The vast majority of small business owners earn less money than they could make working as an employee for somebody else. But they don’t want to work for somebody else. People have feelings, emotions, and desires that may be uniquely their own. Who are we to judge?

A software developer earning good money wants to open up a cookie shop.

A lawyer wants to start a charter fishing company in the Gulf of Mexico.

A physician wants to renovate an old house and create a bed ‘n breakfast.

Go figure. May not make sense to us, but it makes all the sense in the world to them.

Those emotions are tied to doing work that’s more rewarding than the work they’re currently doing. They don’t care about the money earning comparisons. They’re willing to earn fewer dollars so they can achieve something else. Something that matters more to them. It’s largely an emotional decision.

Your enthusiasm and passion aren’t fueled so much by logic, but whatever logical foundation exists is fueled by emotions. I could likely bring up a topic close to your heart and your interest in that topic would be noticeable. Your voice would change. The tempo of your speech would amp up. Your eyes would widen. You’d lean more forward. Emotions.

Those are positive. Well, they could be if they’re leveraged properly. Context matters. The software developer with 3 kids and a wife earning $120K a year may want to open up a cookie shop and risk the entire family’s savings. Maybe a good idea. Maybe not. He and his family can judge. Emotions.

A business owner can obsess about not paying employees more than minimum wage. Emotions. Refusing to budge he finds himself in constant turmoil unable to find or keep competent help. But he won’t budge on the hourly pay rate because he remembers how little money he earned starting out.

One thing has nothing to do with the other. He’s being irrational. It’s purely emotional. And it’ll kill his business.

It happens all the time. Business owners get fixated on something that is a pet peeve – either for or against. And like a dog with a bone, they refuse to let go. They’ve poured so much emotion into their viewpoint they’re unwilling and unable to let go. They need to pour that emotion out of their business so they can grow as leaders/owners and so their business can grow. I see it get in the way often as you peel back why an owner feels the way he does about certain things. When you can finally to the root of the emotion, it hardly ever has one thing to do with the issue at hand. That’s crippling!

It sounds nuts perhaps, but it’s time to take an inventory of your emotions. Time to figure out the ones that serve you well and the ones that stifle your progress. We all have our share of both. This may be best done with a one-word question, “Why?”

Why are you feeling this way? Why does this amp you up so? Why does this bother you?

Why does the software engineer want to open up a cookie shop? He may not even know or understand why. It may be less about a cookie shop and more about his hatred for his boss. He may love engineering software, but he hates doing it for this guy. Or, he may hate engineering software, but he stays because he loves his boss. Or, he may hate all of it and simply love baking cookies. That’s the ball of yarn he’ll have to untangle to better understand why he wants to open a cookie shop.

A feeling can be diffcult to harness. Harder still to let it go if it’s harmful to us. I talk quite about bit about forgiveness and bitterness because I see them destroy a lot of people. When people ask me, “How can I forgive?” — I always offer the same answer. “Just make up your mind.” I’m not being snarky or sarcastic. I mean it. It’s the only way to do it. Just decide. But a mind has to be in a place – a place where a person is ready to make that decision. Else, it won’t happen.

Ditto with any other negative emotion that’s crippling your business or your organization. Throw a fit when an employee offers a discount of $85 without asking you. Make a full day production out of it if you want. Show everybody who’s boss and how intolerant you’re going to be that behavior. You’ll wreck way more than a day. You’ll wreck your company. All for $85?

Come to yourself. Realize the risk and reward of the emotion. You may feel better after ranting and railing about the $85 discount. But unless you’re an idiot you’ll realize $85 isn’t risking your company, but you going off incessantly about it may. Let reality hit you square in the face so you can see things for what they are — damaging. Then, let go. Pour that emotion down the drain so it ceases being toxic to you and your company.

Replace it with the passion that drives you to higher achievement. Those competitive juices that fuel you to be the best. To deliver superior customer experiences. To do all the things required of becoming “world-class.” You need those emotions. But they’re too often suppressed by the fixation on the $85 unauthorized discount.

It’s good to get worked up. Just make sure you’re getting worked up about the things that will help you and your company grow, improve and transform. I want you and your company to grow great. Don’t let unhinged negative emotions ruin that for you.

Be well. Do good. Grow great!

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Episode 100 of the Grow Great Daily Brief was preceded by hundreds of other episodes through the years, but it’s a milestone of the new format…and I want to thank everybody who listens and subscribes. I hope you find value here as together we work to grow, improve and transform our companies and our leadership. I’ve chosen a powerful theme for this 100th episode, the TRUTH.

Monday night the Dallas Cowboys showed how pitiful they truly are in a loss to a mediocre Titans team, 28-14. Most of us living in DFW weren’t terribly surprised. The radio outrage Tuesday morning continues. People are tired of the last 20 years of average football played by this team. But the Cowboys have a brilliant businessman at the helm, Jerry Jones. He’s only got one major blindspot it seems, the delusion of being able to construct and lead a winning football team. Making money ain’t the problem. Winning games? Well, that’s far more challenging to Mr. Jones. But he doesn’t appear willing to see the truth of his football circumstance. Yet. Probably never will.

Sometimes success reinforces the lie and gives our delusions extended life.

When your business is as financially successful as the Cowboys are, I’m sure it’s very hard to see any failure. Jerry Jones isn’t any different than you and me in that regard. He’s looking at the valuation of the team, now presumed to be the most valuable sports franchise in the world at $4.8 BILLION. Hard to argue with the business end of things. But professional football, and all other pro sports is a different breed of cat. There’s the team’s performance in the sport, and there are the dollars brought in by the team. For the Dallas Cowboys, those are two desperate things.

Financial success reinforces the notion, “Look at how successful we are. We’re doing things right.” It’s hard to argue with…making it more sinister by deepening the delusion.

Where are the lies in your life and your business?

You know what vexes me as much as anything? Entrepreneurs who don’t see what’s possible – with “what’s possible” defined as growth and improvement. Many businesses operate every day on the lie of “good enough.” Sales are good enough. Profits are good enough. Systems are good enough. People are good enough. Too many business owners presuppose that their current success is good enough. They’re satisfied. Complacent. But they don’t sense it for what it really is. Dangerous!

I once found a way for a $3 million annual revenue increase for a business. At the time, the business was doing pretty well. Better than they’d done in 2 years. That success made the owner gunshy to see, face or adjust to THE TRUTH. At the time, I was doing hardcore roll-up-your-sleeves-get-your-hands-dirty consulting. I no longer do that work because it’s so incredibly frustrating for me. The business didn’t pursue this potential increase. Two years later, they were back to a cyclical struggle. And I felt awful, even though they were way back there in my rearview mirror by then. It was just painful to see the TRUTH but unable to help them see it. But success got in the way.

Seeing, facing and adjusting to the truth is a viewpoint, mindset, and attitude.

Do you question the current state of things? Including success?

Do you believe – truly believe – that things can be improved?

I’m not talking about a restless discontentment, but I’m talking about leveraging a constant state of dissatisfaction. That’s why Cowboys fans are so upset. For more than 2 decades they’ve endured the same ‘ol, same ‘ol. One season blurs into another season of mediocre results. The sameness is what’s driving fans crazy.

That sameness drives people inside and outside your company crazy, too. But it needs to drive YOU crazy…crazy enough to be tired of it so you can hit the 3rd leg of the trifecta, to avoid going crazy in the process of improving your business.

Success can spoil you. Failure can panic you. But the Truth will set you free.

What is TRUTH?

If you see it one way, and I see it another way — who is right? Maybe both of us are right. The glass indeed is half empty and half full at the same time. But those viewpoints are dramatically different. Those viewpoints lead to completely different attitudes and actions.

Enter the power of others.

I’m pushing all my proverbial chips into the middle of the table to bet on the power of surrounding business owners/entrepreneurs with other entrepreneurs. Because the value proposition is unparalleled. In the span of my 30 plus year career, I’ve seen nothing – NOTHING – that can approach the positive impact of being surrounded by people committed to helping us see, face and adapt to the truth.

Speed. Convenience. 

I don’t know a single CEO or entrepreneur who has enough time. Everybody is pressed on multiple fronts.

I don’t know a single CEO or entrepreneur who is satisfied with the speed of their own decision-making. Everybody is clamoring for more and better information delivered to them faster so they can be faster in figuring out what should be done.

I don’t know a single CEO or entrepreneur who has enough convenience in their decision-making. Everybody is appropriately vexed at the complexity and difficulty of getting the feedback and information necessary to grow and improve.

That’s the power of others surrounding us with no other agenda other than to help us make better decisions! Candor from others. Candor from others with multiple viewpoints, and the ability to ask different questions. Perspective changes everything. It’s among the many reasons the police seek out as many witnesses as possible. When you put together multiple viewpoints you get a much more accurate picture of what really happened. The Truth.

The Truth will not emerge when everybody is saying YES to us, or when everybody is working hard to make us happy. Most of us are surrounded by people more willing to please us than push us. It’s true for you, me and Jerry Jones. But that’s not where growth or improvement is found. It’s only found when we surround ourselves with people willing to help us see, face and adapt to the truth.

It’s up to each of us to embrace a philosophy of being dissatisfied. Not a state of misery, but a state where we’re optimistic that tomorrow can be better. If only slightly. And the day after that, better yet. It’s a sad place to be when we feel as though we’re good enough. There’s always growth and improvement to be achieved. We just need to have people around us who are committed to help us.

Be well. Do good. Grow great!

P.S. The Peer Advantage is my response to the need. Please check it out if you’re ready to grow your business and your life. Click here.

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I’ve coached my fair share of teams. And people. Some in sports. Some kids. Some college kids. Some in business. Some kids. Some not.

The most engaged times I’ve ever spent were leading teams best described as TIGHT, TOUGH and TOGETHER.

Listen to any sports team coach and you’ll hear the importance of these things. They’ll use terms like “chemistry” or “culture” to describe it, but these three T’s are what they really mean.

The Dallas Stars hockey club has a first-year coach, Jim Montgomery. Like most folks in hockey, Jim has a nickname, “Monty.” The team is only about a dozen games into a new season with a new coaching staff. So far, so good. The team has been on an extensive road trip playing games out of town. On Monday Monty said he was noticing the team was growing tighter. It’s noticeable on the bench during games. The team is growing because they’re getting tight, and playing tougher because they’re more together than in earlier games.

Tight.

Tough.

Together.

What about your team? Would those terms – all 3 of them – describe your employees?

Or, do you find yourself using cliches like, “The left hand doesn’t know what the right hand is doing”?

I hear far more of those cliches than CEOs who are proud to extol the virtues of their company culture. I think I know why. It seems to me that too many CEOs and entrepreneurs aren’t quite sure how to go about it. An easy barometer is to see all the outfits offering to help leaders improve culture. Another barometer is the breadth of conversation and content surrounding company or organizational culture. Lots of us are talking about it and concentrating our work on it. Doubtful we’d be doing that if there wasn’t a strong need.

Part of the challenge is the diversity of today’s workforce. When companies employee people in their 50’s, 40’s, 30’s and 20’s – those are very different people who view the world through different lenses. Employee engagement firms focus on assessments. Companies are data-driven and these companies work hard to give clients what they most want – data. The assumption is that once you know how well (or how poorly) you’re doing with employee engagement, then you’ll know how to improve it. But that’s not necessarily true.

I can go to a doctor and get an accurate diagnosis. That doesn’t mean I’m going to get well. If the doctor tells me what I need to do, I may decide to refuse. I may choose some other course of action. I may decide to do nothing. Assessments may be very helpful, but they’re not the prescription any more than our doctor’s diagnosis.

You are here. Good to know. There’s where you want to go. Also good to know. The big challenge we often face is how do we get from where we are to where we want to be.

Monty, the Dallas Stars coach, could see that his new team needed to improve the three areas of chemistry or culture. They needed to be tight, tough and together. NHL teams usually begin a season with a week away from home before the pre-season games begin. Unlike NFL teams who may spend weeks in camp before the end of the season, the NHL clubs have a different business model. For starters, they don’t have 53 players on a roster so they don’t need as much time to get their team’s roster lined out. Additionally, they’ve all got minor league teams where they develop players. The NFL has no such advantage. NFL teams play 16 regular season games. NHL teams play 82 regular season games, 41 on the road and 41 at home.

That’s an important difference because by the time the NHL teams go to their camp for a week, they’ve got their final roster. Mostly. NFL teams don’t have their final roster until after the camp is over. So the Dallas Stars go to camp with chemistry being a major goal. To develop a roster where those 3 terms are growing more important.

Tight.

Tough.

Together.

Being away from home, focused on the team helps. Road trips, especially those early in the season, can also help. Or hurt. If the team hits a losing streak during the road trip, being away from home for extended days can wreck chemistry. It’s a fragile thing.

For a professional sports team on the road, team meals, team movie night, team activities away from the rink can help. And every coach knows to have players who genuinely like each other helps, too. The tighter the bond between the players the more powerful their chemistry. It’s manifested in their willingness to perform well FOR each other, not merely for themselves. Over time, the team – THE LOCKER ROOM – becomes the thing.

I use professional sports because of the dollars spread through the roster. Unlike in your company, the compensation differences among players can be vast. A player making a few hundred thousand a year may be playing alongside a player earning in excess of $5 million a year. If ever there was an opportunity for complaining and whining, “He makes more than me!” – this is it. And you think you’ve got problems.

So far, this week a theme is emerging. We improve what we focus on. First, we started out Monday talking about people. Yesterday we talked about processes. Now, we’re talking about the merging of both I suppose so we can help our employees achieve more. To help our employees improve these 3 key areas that constitute the culture of our company.

Don’t impose what you think or feel is right.

You can make things worse without trying. Monty could deploy strategies to help his Dallas Stars’ team chemistry and end up building more resentment. CEOs and entrepreneurs do it all the time. Movie nights with the players, for example, only work because the team is in Canada, a thousand miles away from home (and their families). If he tried to impose that when the team is home, the players would feel and think, “I don’t want to spend more time with my teammates, I want to be with my family.” Why then, do I hear (with great regularity) employees complain that the boss has cooked up some event after hours? Because the boss thinks it’ll help build tight, tough and together employees. Well, it may. They’ll be tight in their opposition to the boss. Tough against whatever the boss wants. Together in their rebellion against the boss. Not quite what we’re after.

You have a team chemistry. A culture. It doesn’t matter if you meant to craft the one you’ve got or not. It is what it is. Put 3 people in a room and it’ll happen organically. It may be good. It may turn violent. You never know.

Our challenge is to create an ecosystem that will foster and encourage the positive elements of being tight, tough and together. Here are some things to consider.

One, what’s important? 

The great advantage of sports is the immediate feedback. Scores. Teams know if they’re winning or losing. And they know for a fact if they’ve won or lost. We operate daily often not knowing any of that. And our people don’t either. That’s a problem.

How we do overcome that? We establish our identity based on what’s important to us. I know a company that claims they want to be “the world’s best.” It sounds great, if not overly lofty. But they don’t operate as though they’re the world’s best (or trying to be). The employees don’t believe it. It just seems laughable and empty.

Walk the talk. Establish priorities and live them. The best customer service companies eat, drink and sleep it. Amazon. Walmart. Honda. It’s not a by-product, but a focus.

Figure out what matters most and make sure you’re following it religiously. People inside and outside your company will notice. Behavior will follow.

Two, reward and punish based on what’s important.

Hockey teams have a fundamental reward system. It’s called “ice time.” Players who perform well get more playing time. Players who don’t, get less. If a player isn’t performing well enough – or not following the coaching – then he may find himself “scratched” from a game, meaning he’s not even on the bench. Or players unable to perform at the high level required may be sent down to a minor league team where they’ll have to prove themselves worthy of rejoining the major team. Reward and punish. (I’m clearly using punish in the sense of consequences intended to serve the team and the player)

High achievers don’t enjoy being tethered to low achievers. Mediocre achievers can find acceptance if they’re putting in the effort to improve, but if they’re not – teams will reject them. Take a look at your roster and get real with yourself on where the rewards and punishments are. You may be rewarding the wrong things. And punish the wrong things, too. It’s a common mistake.

I’m reminded of the Simpson’s episode where Homer skipped out of work on a Thursday. The boss found out and talked to him on the phone ripping into him. The boss says, “If you don’t come in tomorrow, don’t’ bother coming in on Monday.” Homer, being Homer, hangs up the phone thrilled. “Woohoo, four day weekend!” Sometimes we do things intending one thing, but it really accomplishes something different. Something we never intended.

You have to make your rewards and punishments consistent with what matters most to your company.

Three, establish and maintain non-negotiable standards. Context matters.

Your company – like any sports team – has to learn how to win. Sometimes our people learn how to lose and find it really hard to get unstuck from that. Multi-million dollar athletes do the same thing. They find a slump that seems like it’ll never end. Coaches know their players and figure out how to lead them individually. One size does not fit all. People aren’t equal. You can be fair, but that doesn’t mean you’re equal.

It’s all about establishing and maintaining non-negotiable standards for the company and for the individual employees. There’s US, then there’s YOU (the employee).

Where does the individual employee fit? That’s their context. I’m rolling these two together for this last point because I think they belong together. There are team standards and there are individual standards within the context of the team.

The top players on the Dallas Stars have a higher expectation. In hockey there are typically four lines, meaning three players go onto the ice and play together. One line consists of these same 3 players. The lines are numbered 1 through 4. Fourth line players know their role, which is often to defend against the other team’s top lines. The coaching staff doesn’t expect that line to score enough goals to win games. If it happens, it’s a good thing, but it’s not the standard for the 4th line. Their non-negotiable standard is to not give up a goal. Lines usually play for just 45 seconds at a time, then the next group jumps onto the ice. That first line knows their non-negotiable standard is to score goals.

Then, within each line are players with different skills and talents. Some are gifted at scoring goals. Others are playmakers, able to make passes to the guys who can score goals. Some are great at playing pucks in the corners of the rink. Others love all that rough stuff in front of the opposing goal. The context of each player plays a big role in helping players understand how they can best contribute.

I talk pretty regularly about not painting all your employees with the same broad brush. It’s important that you spend time with individual employees and know what they’re able to most contribute to the whole. It’s rewarding for them, and your company.

By the way, I define non-negotiable standards as standards that could cost a player (an employee) their role. Their job. You get what you reward or whatever you tolerate. Tolerate toxicity and you’ll have a toxic culture. That’s why standards matter. Context helps you serve the toxic employee individually to better understand how their behavior is hurting them and everybody else.

Tight. Tough. Together. It doesn’t happen accidentally. Leaders foster it. They create it. Build it. The great ones never let it slip – or for very long.

Be well. Do good. Grow great!