Podcast

What Would Google Do? – Grow Great Daily Brief #192 – April 18, 2019

On Tuesday Inc. magazine published an article by columnist Betsy Mikel (I’m a fan of her work) about what Google discovered about high achieving teams. Google’s manager of the People Innovation Lab conducted a 2-year study involving 5,600 Google employees. She also conducted focus groups with about 100 employees. On April 4, 2019 Veronica Gilrane, the manager, published her findings on the Google blog.

The study discovered 3 specific things that tight-knit, productive teams do differently. I’m curious what you think about their findings.

First, they allow and even encourage mindless chit chat. 

What with open office concepts where workers don headphones, and increasingly remote workers…there are fewer and fewer spontaneous conversations. When you don’t have chance encounters with co-workers you have fewer opportunities to get to know each other.

Many organizations have meeting intensive cultures. Leaders may think it best to hit the ground running in the meeting by jumping straight into the agenda. It’s easy to think you’ll be considerate of everybody’s time by diving directly into the hard business at hand. The problem is that sometimes we’re pushing for productivity when the team needs time to bond. A few beginning minutes spent answering the question, “What did you do this weekend?” can foster a deeper understanding among teammates. It helps employees see each other as people and not merely co-workers.

It can be helpful to arrive early to the meeting (whether it’s an in-person or virtual) so time can be spent in idle chit chat. Turns out, that chit chat isn’t so idle. It builds relationships.

Second, they switch up the time for recurring meetings. 

At Google 30% of their meetings involve teammates in two or more time zones. That means some team members may be staying late at work, while others are getting up very early. If your team is spread out it’s impossible to find meeting times that conveniently accommodate everybody. Rather than impose on the same people’s schedule each time, mix things up and let everybody take a turn at staying late or getting up early.

Quite simply, this is an act of kindness and consideration. If you don’t manage remote teams, you can likely leverage this tactic by implementing those qualities in your work environment. Nothing trumps kindness and consideration.

Third, Google discovered that in video meetings it’s important for members to use their words and their face.

Video conferencing platforms are very good these days (and continuing to get better). Most of us understand the value of muting our microphones when we’re not talking. The problem is people don’t always know if we’re engaged or not. We can be on video calls and notice people are doing other things. It makes for unengaged conversation.

Pay attention to how you show up on the call. Subtle behaviors like nodding, uncrossing your arms, having your webcam set at eye level…these can drastically improve the experience. And verbal validation helps, too. Think of how you feel when you’re on a video call and somebody says, “Sounds like a good idea.”

Be attentive. Be present. Google even has a Distributed Work Playbook. (click that link and you can download the PDF)

I’ll also give a shout out to the kids over at Basecamp who wrote a book entitled, REMOTE: Office Not Required. It’s another great resource if you’re considering a remote workforce.

What I like about this Google study is the practical “this is what we do” nature of it. Scholars and academians enjoy complicating things. Google proves that execution is practical. Easy? Not necessarily, but doable if leadership will lead and if people will understand where and how they fit in the business.

Things have changed dramatically over the past 10 years at Google, but in 2009 Jeff Jarvis wrote a nice book entitled, “What Would Google Do?”

Jarvis chronicles 40 rules employed at Google. Some are counter-intuitive. Others innovative. It’s worth reading to escape whatever box may contain your current thinking.

I’m not urging you to ask that question so you can make direct application to your business. Let’s face it, you’re not Google, but looking at a behemoth manage 10,000 employees spread across 150 cities is bound to have value.

The broader lesson may be the value derived from outside perspectives. We’re all steeped in our own industries. We read the same trade material, admire those who are at the top of our field and largely…we’re drawn to follow the leader. That leads to a lot of copycat behavior where innovation stagnates. It doesn’t foster bold courage to try something different – something that may just catapult us to a new height of achievement.

Be well. Do good. Grow great!

RC

What Would Google Do? – Grow Great Daily Brief #192 – April 18, 2019 Read More »

What’s Your Big Obstacle? – Grow Great Daily Brief #191 – April 17, 2019

I walk for about an hour every day. Some days I’ll take multiple walks. A portion of my route is walking around a couple of baseball fields. Unless teams are practicing or playing, the gates are always locked. There’s fencing around the whole complex, including a pitching area and batting practice area. The city doesn’t want just anybody going onto the fields. The infields are quite nicely manicured. Even though the fence is higher than 6 feet tall, I could easily hop over if I wanted. But I’m law-abiding so I don’t.

On the back side of the fields are a number of pine trees responsible for dropping tons of pine cones onto the ground. They’re sort of like obstacles. You can’t possibly walk in a straight line through that area. Navigation requires dodging and parrying through about 75 yards of pine cone strewn path.

Fences. Gates. Locks. Walls. Doors. These are common obstacles we intentionally put into place. Like the city’s ball fields, we want to keep folks out.

Pine cones. Fallen limbs. Mud puddles. These are also common obstacles we encounter. Natural impediments that force us to navigate more carefully.

Some obstacles stop us. Others just slow us down.

Organizational obstacles do the same thing. Some stop us. Others slow us down.

Every leader, entrepreneur or small business owner has a big obstacle right now. This very minute.

It may not be the one you had yesterday. Like those pine cones, I encounter, within a few months (or less), those will be gone. They won’t remain obstacles for long, but right now they’re a major pain because there are so many of them.

Some obstacles happen overnight, like a Texas thunderstorm. We had a storm blow through a week or so ago and the neighborhood looked like a pack of wild tree urchins had knocked limbs off every tree around here. Everybody was out cleaning the debris for a few days. We weren’t expecting what we got.

Some obstacles are opportunities. I’ve had buddies who love to go mudding. They have their jacked up Jeeps hot-rodded out and nothing pleases them more than to see some big mud to drive through or some terrain that can show off the prowess of their vehicle with about 3 feet of clearance!

Whatever your current obstacle…let’s think about it for a few minutes. It’s a problem that needs a solution. Something you need to figure out. That doesn’t mean it’s something that needs to be fixed…like a clogged toilet. It may mean that it’s something to be taken advantage of…like a big mud hole to your 4-wheel drive Jeep. But something about it is making you afraid. The fear (or whatever else you’re feeling) is the real hurdle or obstacle. Not the thing itself.

THAT’S the answer to the question, “What’s your big obstacle?”

Wrestling that down can provide clarity as you work to resolve what you should do. So look past the pine cones, the locked gates, the walls, the doors or the fallen limbs. What’s really going on with you?

Some obstacles are so minor they’re merely inconveniences. Pine cones, for example.

Other obstacles are still somewhat minor, but they’re bigger aggravations. Fallen limbs that require a chain saw demand more time and attention. They don’t pose any real risk, but they’re big enough you can’t ignore them by walking around them (like pine cones). You have to remove them. Obstacle removal can be quick and easy or long and expensive. It depends.

Most small business owners use a single word when describing their big obstacle. Frustrating.

Fear is another popular word I hear. “I’m afraid if I don’t (do this particular thing), then it may be a mistake.”

Let me tell you what your biggest obstacle really is? It’s your habit of how you think. It’s your default thoughts about challenges or opportunities. That doesn’t mean it’s how you ALWAYS think, but it may be how you mostly think. Or how you think often enough that it doesn’t serve you well as you try to grow and move forward.

He’s operated his business for a little over a decade. Ray, his right-hand guy has been with him almost all of it, going on 8 years. Now he’s leaving and the owner is near despondent. He’s tried to convince the guy to not leave, but it’s out of his control. The right-hand man’s wife has accepted a great job 2 states away. There’s no negotiating with this obstacle.

The business has been growing steadily about 5-7% each year for the last 8 years. The owner has no clue what he’s going to do. He’s in full-blown scramble mode. Most of us can relate.

Enter a shift in thinking. Questions help.

What if you could hire somebody capable of helping you accelerate the growth of the company?

What skills have you long wished Ray had?

What negative traits have you wished Ray didn’t have?

What if this wasn’t a bad thing? What if it was an opportunity for you to bring in new talent even more capable of achieving better results?

The owner rifled through a file of unsolicited resumes. “I’ve got a pretty short list of people who have impressed me along the way. I’ve kept up with them, but I have no idea if they’d be interested in working with me or not,” says the owner.

Very quickly the conversation changes the framing of the situation. What was a big obstacle is now seen as a possible opportunity. Before Ray walks out the door, taking his 8 years of experience with him, the owner had Ray’s replacement on board. Ray spends time walking the new hire through the nitty gritty of the work. Ray’s happy to help because the circumstances of his leaving have nothing to do with him being unhappy. The big obstacle was a loss. Ray was very good at the job. But it was also an opportunity. Ray’s replacement will go on to bring some new things to the job.

So it goes with frustration and fear. We need to stare it down and see it for what it really is. Or for what it could be.

YOU make the difference. That’s right, you the leader, make all the difference. How you choose to view it…how you choose to tackle it…that’s what will determine the value or the cost of the obstacle.

Don’t give the power to the obstacle. Give yourself the power to see it in a different light. Or to minimize the threat of it. Or to maximize the opportunity of it.

What I see as a major mud hole where I’d most certainly get stuck…a Jeep loving buddy sees as a big fun!

What I see as a hassle to navigate (a path strewn with pine cones) is a school kid’s dream…or Joanna Gaines’ dream decorating idea.

What I see as a time-consuming task of tree limb removal could also be seen as nature’s way of pruning dead branches from the trees in my yard. Have you priced tree services lately? Money saved.

Flip the obstacle around. View it from every angle. Question it at every turn. Figure it out.

Be well. Do good. Grow great!

RC

What’s Your Big Obstacle? – Grow Great Daily Brief #191 – April 17, 2019 Read More »

Who Do You Need? – Grow Great Daily Brief #190 – April 16, 2019

Long-standing conventional wisdom among performance gurus tells us that the super achievers ask WHO not HOW. When facing an opportunity or challenge, I see the high value of asking who, but I also know the high value of asking how! Gurus love absolutes. Just more proof I suppose that I am NOT a guru! Although I do always buckle my seatbelt, keep my arms inside the rides at Six Flags and I never grab a dog by the ears. So there’s that!

Seriously, WHO is a great question for leaders. Is it the best question? Personally, I don’t think there is some secret question contest. I’m rather fond (as you well know) of lots of questions because I believe in the high value of curiosity.

But this is about YOU. It’s about you because you’re a leader. The paradox is that if you don’t work on your own personal growth, then your service to others will be more limited. It’s the stuff of growing great. You need to be great in order to help others achieve their own greatness. That’s what leaders do.

Do you have a growth plan for yourself?

Your daily life has a fairly intense focus on WHO. Even around your house. Who is going to fix that minor electrical problem with the house? Who is going to collect and carry out the trash? Who is going to rake those leaves?

You arrive at the office and the same question continues. Who is going to finish that analysis? Who is going to submit that report? Who is going to begin that project?

Today, we’re going to internalize the question and have you focus on the title question of today’s episode…

Who do you need?

It’s not who you need to do the tasks you need to be done. It’s who you need for your own personal and professional leadership growth.

Sometimes I encounter leaders who have never given it much thought. A few even arrogantly declare they don’t need anybody. Funny, but nobody ever says they accomplished success alone, without the help of anybody. We all readily admit others helped us along the way. And are still helping us.

Why then is it so difficult for some to soberly consider who they need to grow even more? I suppose a variety of things…like success, which can make some complacent. Or pride, which can make people refuse any sign of vulnerability.

We don’t have time to dive into all your personal issues that may prevent you from reaching out for the help you most need. Just know this, if you don’t ask – you don’t get. You know that’s true. So sit there being brave or courageous or whatever description you use to portray your hardheadedness. But you’ve got an awful lot of advantage to gain if you’ll just surrender to the truth that you need people around you to help you achieve more, to help you increase your self-awareness, to help eliminate your blind spots and to help you learn, understand and grow.

I can’t possibly know the exact answer of who you may need at this very moment. I just know you have the need because it’s universal for people intent on growing great.

What do you want to accomplish?

That’s for you to figure out. Please let me urge you to raise the bar. And that may lead to the first who. Somebody willing to challenge you and push you.

This doesn’t mean a combatant. It means somebody who understands you and your context enough to nudge you toward heights you may not even think are possible.

But who?

Somebody who believes in you. People who don’t believe in you can’t push you in the most positive ways. Only the people who know you well enough to have faith in your capacity can do this for you. You have a responsibility here in that you alone determine how well people get to know you. I know that restricts the population of people who may be able to do this. You’re not going to let just anybody get to know you in such an intimate way. Certainly not professionally. I get it.

But you need somebody with whom you can be completely candid, honest and open. I know it’s a tall order. That’s why so few CEOs and business owners leverage the advantage of people like that in their lives. I’m urging you to be exceptional and join the ranks of the very best operators in the world, the top leaders.

Who else?

It’s congruent with a person who has a deep belief in you and is able to challenge you to grow…but you also need a person who will encourage you. Everybody – including leaders – needs an encourager in their life. Somebody with the necessary willingness and ability to fully express that belief in us.

Sometimes it may be the same person who is able to nudge us forward with an appropriate challenge. But maybe not.

For years I’ve been fascinated at the behavior of little boys. Probably because I’ve been surrounded by so many of them. From coaching sports to raising a son, to having four grandsons. And I was once a little boy myself.

Showing off is not restricted to little boys – I’ve got a granddaughter who readily competes for attention all the time. But there’s something unique in how little boys want to show off especially to mom or grandmother. It’s that “hey look at me” thing. It’s how God wired us as males. Yes, Virginia men and women are different. I didn’t say better. I said DIFFERENT.

I have a Christian viewpoint. I believe in the creation story you read about in the book of Genesis. I also know the Bible commands wives to respect their husbands and for husbands to love their wives. It speaks directly to the knowledge God has in how He created us. He knows what we most need.

Little boys (and big ones, too) want respect, adoration, and praise. We want mom and grandma to brag on us. We crave their encouragement.

Yes, little girls (and bigger ones, too) want and need the same things. The little girls who have been in my life – and are still in my life – crave love, affection, and safety.

This isn’t a one or the other affair. It’s an AND kind of a deal. We all need and crave respect, adoration, praise, love, affection, and safety. The order of those can differ because we’re individuals.

People need encouragement. It’s a unique form of having somebody who truly believes in us. Who in your life provides that? Anybody?

Maybe there are other areas where you desperately need somebody…a who! Figure that out and find them. Don’t be bashful to solicit their help. Remember, if you don’t ask…you don’t get.

Be well. Do good. Grow great!

RC

Who Do You Need? – Grow Great Daily Brief #190 – April 16, 2019 Read More »

Visions Of Leadership: How Do You Show Up? – Grow Great Daily Brief #189 – April 15, 2019

It’s among one of the most underrated elements of leadership. Underrated in that not enough leaders give it the full attention it deserves. It’s very difficult to keep it at the forefront of our intentional behavior, but surely most of us can do better.

How do you show up?

When I was growing up – and attending elementary school – times were very different. Parents – just about ALL parents – impressed their school-age kids to behave and “act like somebody.” Moms made sure we were all clean, neat and prepared for our first day of school. And every day thereafter. Shirttails tucked in. Homework completed. On our best behavior. And they’d ask our teachers how we behaved. That was back when kids didn’t rule the world and our folks insisted we treat teachers with respect. We called all adults “sir” and “ma’am.” Like I say, it was a different time. 😉

Our parents taught us the importance of how we showed up because of the way we looked and how we behaved reflected on them. We had a responsibility to our family and our name.

Fast forward into the corporate office, shop floor or any other place where leadership is exhibited and that principle is still valid. How we show up matters.

What does it mean?

It may be easier to consider what it doesn’t mean because it includes most everything. From major appearances to micro-movements of body language. Mostly, it means that people are watching and paying attention. They’re taking visual and audible cues from leadership. That puts a positive burden on leaders to display things that will serve others.

It doesn’t mean leaders front. Phony leadership isn’t effective. Hypocrisy isn’t a trait of any good leader.

It does mean an honest, self-awareness of what others need. It’s not about you. It’s about them.

Contrivances aren’t part of it, but intentionality is. Effective leaders show up with intent and purpose to provide whatever is most helpful at the time.

Social intelligence is defined as the ability to successfully build relationships and navigate social environments. In short, it’s our ability to read a situation as a leader and respond in ways that can serve others. Social intelligence requires listening, watching and paying close attention to others. Leaders unwilling or unable to do that will fail to show up as they should to best serve the people they lead.

Questions can help.

What’s going on?

What are people doing?

What are they feeling?

What do they most need?

What can YOU do to help? What can YOU supply?

If all eyes and ears are on YOU (and they are), then what’s the message you’re sending (either intentionally or unintentionally)?

Part of this is why leadership is so lonely. It does require a more public display that may not always be fully congruent with how you truly feel, or what you truly think. That’s not being fake. Or hypocritical. It’s being a proper servant of the people you lead. Again, it’s about them – not you. You put yourself on a back burner.

Sometimes displays of anger or displeasure are effective. People need to see it. It can curb poor behavior, spark improved behavior and help people get on track.

Sometimes displays of patience and longsuffering are effective. People need to know they’re no longer in the dog house. They need to feel reassured that you have confidence in their ability to recover.

How you show up is determined not by how you feel when you wake up, but by what the organization needs from you today. Right now. And that may change during the course of the day. Or depending on who you’re interacting with.

It means you pre-think and prepare how you’re doing to show up before you actually (physically) show up. Before you enter the conference room or the meeting, you’re highly aware of your mood, how your voice will sound (tone) and how you’ll look. Your facial expressions, posture and body language will all impact the people you lead. You’ll be fully responsible to provide the best vision possible for your people so they can perform at their highest level.

Lastly, it means if you fail to do that…you’re being selfish, making it all about you. Don’t do that. Get behind a closed door and do whatever you must to make sure that when the door opens you’re appearing as you need to to help others. As the leader, you have what Pat Riley created in the old Los Angeles Lakers’ culture back in the days of Kareem and Magic…he called it, “Showtime!” You’re on stage. Even if you’re an introvert. People are paying attention to you. You want that. It goes along with leadership.

Be responsible for how you show up. Make it always count to the favor of the people you serve.

Be well. Do good. Grow great!

RC

Visions Of Leadership: How Do You Show Up? – Grow Great Daily Brief #189 – April 15, 2019 Read More »

30 Seconds To Decide – Grow Great Daily Brief #188 – April 12, 2019

We’re kids. Somebody has a basketball in their hands. Without warning they use both arms to shove a pass toward me shouting, “Think fast!” If I did (think fast enough), then I’d extend my arms and catch the ball before it hit me in the chest. If I failed (to think fast enough), then I might find myself gasping for breath. And when I caught it, I’d likely go tearing after the guy who hit me. Catch the ball or retaliate. Either way, I win. 😉

That whole “think fast” game we played at kids had value. For starters, always pay attention. You could be blindsided at a moment’s notice, like Cata’s sneak attacks on Inspector Clouseau.

Snappy reflexes help. Snappier decisions drive those reflexes.

When a basketball is coming at you hard from four feet away, there’s no time to ponder. In fact, before my friend has a chance to say, “Think fast” I already am at full throttle to get my hands up to catch the ball.

Have you ever been going along, with some point of view – or some decision you made – and in mere seconds your view changes? Your mind changes? Faster than the snap of your fingers you find yourself deciding something very different. Feeling something different. Thinking something different.

It happened to me about a week ago. The details don’t matter. I started considering this whole speed thing when it comes to making up our mind, or changing our mind, or deciding something, or doing something. Or all of the above.

Recently, much of my work has been focused on things like character, values, and principles. Namely, as it relates to leadership and culture. What we believe determines our character, our values, and our principles. These aren’t static things. That doesn’t mean they change with the wind, but it does mean our experiences, learning, understanding, and growing can adjust them. Usually, that happens gradually and slowly. But not always. It depends on how we’re living.

This college admissions/Wall Street scandal is dominating news lately. Until it hit the fan, these folks, including Hollywood actors and actresses, were living whatever normal might describe their lives. Suddenly, when the FBI knocks on your door, you experience a “think fast” moment. Steve Farber has another name for it, an “Oh-S#@!-Moment” or OSM! for short.

In these cases, I suspect panic ensues in less than 30 seconds. Decisions to call attorneys are likely the only decisions to make. That, and the decision to keep one’s mouth shut.

None of us can argue that lives can be dramatically altered in mere seconds. I often think about the song by Matt Kearney, a Nashville singer-songwriter, “Closer To Love.” We’re all just one phone call from our knees.

Do you suppose the values, character, and principles of any of the indicted people in the college/Wall Street scandal have changed? Well, if they’re guilty of what they’re accused of, I’d hope so. I’d hope seismic shifts have happened for them so they’ll learn, understand and grow. So it goes with values, character, and principles…when we’re behaving badly because those components in our life are poor quality.

Thankfully, I’ve never experienced the FBI knocking at my door, but I have experienced seismic changes in my life brought about by sudden news. Life changing events. Most of us have experienced those.

But I’m talking about changes we make in our own mind. On our own. Meaning, we decided. Not that we did it alone without any input or impetus, but nobody did it for us. Within seconds some shift occurred to change our mind. Within seconds we made a decision that set us on a different path than the one we previously had decided we’d travel.

Think fast.

People often challenge us to go with our first answer. Follow your gut. The same people may also criticize us if we’re too impulsive. Or not thoughtful or intentional enough.

Well, which is it?

It depends. And you know what it depends on. It depends on whether you got it right – as they see it. If your first answer was the right one – meaning, they think it was the right answer – then you should go with that one. If your first answer was the wrong one – meaning, they didn’t agree with it – then you need to give it more thought.

Forget what other people think. Instead, think about what’s right. This is why I’m increasingly fascinated with character, values, and principles. The guiding beliefs behind our decisions and actions are everything. Each of us is going to behave in ways congruent with what we believe. That’s why we often urge our children and young adults in our lives to “guard their heart.” We want them to protect themselves from allowing their character, values and principles to erode. It’s also why we care about who our kids hang around. We want them to be around good humans who embrace the values we prize most.

Thirty seconds to decide is both an exercise and a practical tool.

Watch any true crime show on the Investigation Discovery channel and you’ll see people who within seconds made really bad choices to murder. For reasons I don’t understand, within seconds that seemed like a good decision to them. Mostly, because it reflected the terrible state of their character, values, and principles. So job one is – be a good human being. Be as good as you can possibly be. Embrace honorable beliefs so you’ll serve humanity well.

Think fast – giving yourself 30 seconds to decide – will most likely result in your deciding something that will be congruent with your beliefs. If you need money and your beliefs are those of a good human, then your first thought isn’t going to be to go rob somebody. But if you’re not a good human being, that may very well be your first thought.

That may explain the apparent wisdom (sometimes) of going with your first answer. It’s likely why so many assessments or tests urge the participant to trust their first answer. Your first answer may more properly reflect your true character or personality.

As we enter Friday and the weekend, let me encourage you to consider how quickly you can alter a decision. How quickly you can change your mind. Literally.

What’s the current impediment to your higher success? What’s keeping you from reaching whatever “the next level” is in your leadership or your life? What’s the constraint standing in the way of your company finding the next rung on the ladder of achievement?

Eliminate every answer that is outside of yourself. This will be tough. You’ll want to blame people, capital, opportunities, challenges and whatever else you can. Don’t. I’m not saying those things aren’t real, but I am saying those may not likely be THE thing standing in your way. More likely than not, you – and a decision only you can make – is the hurdle.

What haven’t you decided that you know you should decide if you’re going to move forward? Quick, think fast. Thirty seconds. Make up your mind in the next 30 seconds to change it.

We fool ourselves into thinking we need more time. Maybe we do. Sometimes. But mostly, I’m growing increasingly less sure about that. We need time to figure things out. To learn and understand and grow. To forge relationships where we can serve. And where we can be served. But each of those can begin right now. This very moment.

Like encouragement, decisions can happen in a flash. Earlier this week I was given a handwritten note. The person listens to my hobby podcast, Leaning Toward Wisdom. She listens to this podcast, too – Grow Great. But over at Leaning Toward Wisdom I’ve grown more focused on a project I’ve labeled #CravingEncouragement. I’ve long loved the little parable of the starfish.

One day, an old man was walking along a beach that was littered with thousands of starfish that had been washed ashore by the high tide. As he walked he came upon a young boy who was eagerly throwing the starfish back into the ocean, one by one.

Puzzled, the man looked at the boy and asked what he was doing. Without looking up from his task, the boy simply replied, “I’m saving these starfish, Sir”.

The old man chuckled aloud, “Son, there are thousands of starfish and only one of you. What difference can you make?”

The boy picked up a starfish, gently tossed it into the water and turning to the man, said, “I made a difference to that one!”

I open this little note given to me by this listener and enclosed what a little picture she’d drawn depicting the little boy tossing a starfish back into the ocean.

It didn’t take me 30 seconds to read the nice note and look at the drawing. The impact lasted much, much longer. And so it goes.

I suspect she decided in a moment to create that drawing and write that note. She spent some time doing it, but her decision was likely fast. My reaction was also fast. The feeling I got the moment I opened it changed immediately. I wasn’t having my best day ever. But in a “think fast” moment, it all changed because she took the time to do this for me. She expressed feeling like a starfish for whom I made a difference when in reality I’m the starfish for whom she made a difference.

I’m closing out this week with an offer to you if you’re a small business owner in the United States willing to decide right now that you’d like to be more intentional and thoughtful about who you surround yourself with. I’m forming a 7-member peer group, mastermind group (call it whatever you’d like; I call it THE PEER ADVANTAGE). Quite literally, it’s my starfish project to serve just 7 entrepreneurs in a virtual group that will meet regularly using video conferencing technology where we do for each other what nobody else can or will. Details are at ThePeerAdvantage.com. Go there right now – it won’t take 30 seconds to get there – and click on the APPLY NOW button (you can read the details if you’d like), but please apply now because there’s no obligation. You’ll just complete a short Google form so I can learn a few things about you and your business, then we’ll schedule a phone call so I can learn more (and you can ask whatever questions you’d like). I look forward to hearing from you.

Be well. Do good. Grow great!

RC

30 Seconds To Decide – Grow Great Daily Brief #188 – April 12, 2019 Read More »

What’s Your Habitual Way Of Explaining Bad Events? – Grow Great Daily Brief #187 – April 11, 2019

In 1990 a paperback book’s title captured my attention while browsing through a bookstore (I frequently haunted bookstores; I miss it).

Learned Optimism: How To Change Your Mind And Your Life

It was written by one Martin E.P. Seligman, Ph.D. I knew I had to read it ’cause the author had TWO middle initials. E.P. stands for Elias Pete by the way. That actually had nothing to do with my buying the book, but I found it interesting nonetheless.

Dr. Seligman is the Director of the Penn Positive Psychology Center and Zellerbach Family Professor of Psychology in the Penn Department of Psychology. I hadn’t heard about “positive psychology” in 1990. Nobody else had either since it was introduced by the good doctor in 1998 when he became the President of the American Psychological Association. The University of Pennsylvania website offers us this definition…

Positive Psychology is the scientific study of the strengths that enable individuals and communities to thrive. The field is founded on the belief that people want to lead meaningful and fulfilling lives, to cultivate what is best within themselves, and to enhance their experiences of love, work, and play.

There’s a chapter about kids. On January 25, 1992 I had my two kids take an assessment contained in the book. My kids were both under the age of 12. I’ve still got their answers, written in their own handwriting. It’s proof of how interested I was in helping my kids grow up to be optimistic.

Dr. Seligman writes…

“Your habitual way of explaining bad events, your explanatory style, is more than just the words you mouth when you fail. It is a habit of thought, learned in childhood and adolescence. Your explanatory style stems directly from your view of your place in the world – whether you think you are valuable and deserving, or worthless and hopeless. It is the hallmark of whether you are an optimist or a pessimist.”

According to Dr. Seligman, there are 3 crucial dimensions to our explanatory style: permanence, pervasiveness, and personalization. Today, let’s focus a bit on that first dimension, permanence.

People who quit or give up easily believe the causes of the bad events that happen to them are permanent. They think the bad events will persist, always impacting their life. People who resist hopelessness believe the causes of the bad events are temporary.

Words matter.

If you think about bad things and attach words like “always” and “never,” then you’re bent toward a permanent, pessimistic style. “This always happens to me,” is a common refrain we heard. Maybe from our own lips. “I never seem to win,” is another common one.

Contrast those terms with these: “sometimes” or “lately.” Those kinds of qualifiers, says Dr. Seligman, blame bad events on transient conditions and mean we have a more optimistic style.

Hopelessness is real for all of us. Sometimes. Because failure makes us all feel hopeless momentarily. We describe it as a gut punch. It buckles our knees. It hurts. Badly sometimes. But the hurt dissipates. For some, it can go away almost immediately. For others, it takes more time. Still, others don’t seem to get over it. They seethe, feeding the pain until it grows into bitterness. These people can remain helpless and hopeless for a long time, even after a small setback. If the hurt is big enough, they may not ever find their way back.

The flip side of this is how we explain good events. No point talking about how we process bad events without considering how we process good ones.

The optimistic style of explaining good events is just the opposite of the optimistic style of explaining bad ones. People who believe good events have permanent causes are more optimistic than people who believe they have temporary causes.

Optimistic people explain good events to themselves in terms of permanent causes. That’s why their self-talk includes terms like traits, abilities and always. Pessimists use different language: moods, effort, sometimes.

People who believe good events have permanent causes try even harder after they succeed. People who see temporary reasons for good events may give up even when they succeed because they’re tempted to believe the success was a fluke.

That’s why yesterday I urged you to keep growing if you’re “on the gold.” Lean into the success and create even more success.

This particular dimension of our explanatory style – permanence – deals with TIME.

It’s important that you – the leader, the business owner – learn to be optimistic and view failure or bad events as merely temporary conditions on the path to success. While simultaneously seeing good events and success as being more permanent and things well within our control.

Why does this matter? Because it will determine our outcomes and the outcomes of our organizations. Pay close attention to the language you use with yourself and with others. You can start changing that language to something more profitable, but I encourage you to do some deeper work by changing your mind so you truly believe.

Be well. Do good. Grow great!

RC

What’s Your Habitual Way Of Explaining Bad Events? – Grow Great Daily Brief #187 – April 11, 2019 Read More »

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