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“What do you want to be when you grow up?”

Every child has been asked that question. A lot.

The answer seems easy when we’re small. A fireman. A football player. A teacher. A nurse.

By the time we leave elementary school our likely answer is, “I don’t know!”

I marvel with envy those people who say, “I’ve ALWAYS wanted to be _________.” How cool would it be to have always known what you wanted to be, what you wanted to do?

I wasn’t that lucky. Or astute.

I’ve had to figure it all out on the fly. It is hard work. Very hard work. You know, right?

And then…there’s the urge to dabble. We all do it. We do a little bit of this and a little bit of that. All in the hopes of finding success. The problem is, you can’t dabble your way to success!

Today’s show is super short, but the message is among the most powerful lessons I’ve learned. I know it’s true. I believe it. But, that doesn’t mean it’s easy to do it.

S.P.F.

You likely think of sunscreen. I do.

It’s a dermatology term that means sun protection factor. I’m not using it as a dermatology term though. Rather, I’m using it to establish my life’s priorities.

Growth in these areas, in this specific order, is very important.

“Man, I’d sure like to change this,” he said.

“Really?”

“Yeah, absolutely. It drives me crazy.”

“You’ve been complaining about that for a long time. Do you want to change it or do you just wish it were different?” I asked.

“Touche!”

“Well, I’m just sayin’ — when you get really sick enough of it I’m guessing you’ll finally decide to do something about it.”

Maybe. Maybe not. Time will tell. It always does.

This story in Rolling Stone caught my eye the other day. I began to wonder what happened to his career in music.

So many questions? Did he experience some tragedy that caused a sudden exit from work that must have been important to him?

I sat in silence for a few moments, refusing to Google his name. I still haven’t Googled it. I just embraced my questions and wonder.

What happened? How did he lose relevance in a space he once occupied? Was it by choice? Or circumstance?

Probably because the news story in Rolling Stone was music related, I began to think of Willis Alan Ramsey, a singer/songwriter who released his first (and so far, only album) in 1972. He was (and I suppose, still is) a strongly talented guy. I love his work. It’s 40 years later and like many of his fans, I’m waiting for the next record.

I may not approach the term “relevance” the way you think. You may expect me to riff about being familiar to millions, achieving notoriety and fame. I won’t. Because that’s not it – not for me. And likely not for you either.

We can be invisible to many and still be relevant. You’re likely in the same big boat with the rest of us. Feeling anonymous and unimportant. But you’re not. There are people who know you and love you. There are others who enjoy being around you – experiencing you. To them, you are relevant. Or you can be!

As the adage goes, “If it is to be, it’s up to me!”

You’ve heard about “the monkey’s dilemma.” It’s that story about the hunter who takes a jar with an opening slightly larger than a monkey’s hand. The hunter ties a rope around the neck of the jar using a knot, called a monkey’s knot. The hunter puts food in the glass jar, like rice, a banana slice or a peanut.

The monkey reaches his hand into the jar, grabs the food, making a fist with his hand. Presto! The monkey’s dilemma: he can’t get his hand out of the jar unless he drops the food. The neck of the jar isn’t wide enough. He could drop the food and easily get his hand out, but he refuses. The monkey has complete control to escape, but he won’t do it. Instead, he clinches his fist around the food until the hunter throws a net over him. He’s captured.

Watch today’s episode and you may see yourself in “the monkey’s dilemma.”