Randy Cantrell

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Here’s what Wikipedia has to say about “Zero Sum Game” –

In game theory and economic theory, a zero-sum game is a mathematical representation of a situation in which each participant’s gain or loss of utility is exactly balanced by the losses or gains of the utility of the other participants. If the total gains of the participants are added up and the total losses are subtracted, they will sum to zero. Thus, cutting a cake, where taking a larger piece reduces the amount of cake available for others, is a zero-sum game if all participants value each unit of cake equally.

Many business owners believe in the zero-sum game. They think the path to growing their business is to take business away from their direct competitors. I admit it can be a fun approach if you’re winning, but ridiculously frustrating if you’re not.

Like so many things in life, it’s a point of view that becomes reality for those who hold to it. Like Henry Ford famously said, “If you think you can do a thing or think you can’t do a thing, you’re right.” Believe it’s true and it seems to become true. At least for you.

You’re competitive. That’s largely what drives you, the urge to win. To compete. To play the game of business. I certainly feel that way. But whenever our business isn’t hitting the targets of success, we have two fundamental choices in how to view it. One, it’s the competition. They’re the reason for it. Two, it’s us. It’s my fault. Today I want to make a strong case for why that second point of view is the smarter view.

“He that is good for making excuses is seldom good for anything else.” —Benjamin Franklin

Excuses don’t make us better. Nobody ever grew great by embracing the practice of excuse-making. The evidence is all around us. It doesn’t work. But if it did, boy would we be surrounded by outlandishly successful people, right?

“Ninety-nine percent of the failures come from people who have the habit of making excuses.” ?George Washington Carver

Can I tell you one big advantage I had in starting my sales career as a 16-year-old? It’s really fortunate and the only role I played was my brashness to walk into a stereo store and ask for a job, then sitting across from the owner and earning a spot on his company’s roster. Working retail at such a young age – working on a straight commission basis (meaning if I sold something I made money, but if I sold nothing…I made nothing) – gave me a perspective that has served me since.

Focus on the customer.

Maybe it was my youthful naivete, but I just didn’t much care what the folks across town at the other stereo shops were doing. I knew them well. I knew what products they carried. I knew how they did business because I had spent hours visiting them. Before I ever began my own career selling hi-fi gear I had established in my mind how I thought a better experience could be given.

Namely, I knew how I was treated each time I went into these stores. And I understood why.

I was just a kid. I was never viewed as a serious prospect. But I loved this stuff. And you have to realize that back then stores weren’t big, warehouse type affairs with hoards of people clogging the aisles. These were small stereo stores where the biggest ones were a few thousand square feet with multiple rooms. Most had 2 to 4 salespeople at most, working at any one time. You could commonly visit a store and be the only shopper there.

I always wondered why many salespeople – people much older than me, but people who I assumed had more experience and know-how – wouldn’t take any time to teach me about some piece of equipment. I’m here. You’re here. Nobody else is here. Why not? (I thought)

Most didn’t behave like that though. So guess what I ALWAYS did?

I was always present with the shopper in front of me. Nobody else mattered. That phone ringing? Somebody else can get that. Anybody else walking into the store? Somebody else can help them. I was completely present with the shopper I was with. Later I would begin to hear sales training experts talk about that. It seemed odd to me because it was intuitive to me. What kind of retail salesperson wouldn’t be present with the shopper they were helping? Idiotic! But common.

That stupidly simple lesson served me for decades. I didn’t know at the time that I was avoiding the trap of excuse-making. It just seemed like the way to go. The smart way to conduct business. Now, years later it seems even smarter.

Business owners can be notoriously territorial. You know it’s true. We can get amped up at the guys across town who drive down our profits. We can get angry with a supplier for selling a profitable line to some hack company that can write a purchase order, but not much else. It’s tempting and easy to get focused on the things we can’t fully control.

You’re not a victim unless you make yourself one.

Today’s show title is a common refrain offered to business owners who lament a downturn in sales or missing their numbers…owners who love to think their lack of success (or growth) isn’t their fault. And that word is inflammatory I know. FAULT.

I understand that sometimes things happen beyond our control. I’ve had suppliers go across town to an arch rival and sign them up after I felt like my company worked hard to build up the brand, build value for the brand in the market, etc. It happens. And when the sales on that brand take a hit, I’ll admit sometimes people would buy it at the competition. But it was my responsibility (do you like that term better than fault?). The supplier wasn’t in control of my fate. The competition sure wasn’t in control of my fate. I was.

Firefighting success hinges on accepting the blame.

I don’t care what anybody tells you. Running a successful enterprise is firefighting. Idealists who have never done it can tell you that you shouldn’t spend your time fighting fires. They’re morons who have never done it. You’d better be an accomplished firefighter because if you’re not, you’re in big trouble!

You never know where the fire is going to erupt. You can prepare, plan and strategize all you want to avert fires, but they’re going to flare up in spite of your best efforts because there are so many variables beyond your control. Like the competition.

Accomplished firefighters are equipped, prepared and ready to jump into action. When the alarm sounds, we spring into action. Period. Our job is to put out the fire. Our job is to propel our company forward. Period.

Somewhere along my career path I read a phrase that stuck with me.

“If it is to be, it’s up to me.” 

I believed it. I still believe it.

Your ability or opportunity to grow great – which includes your ability to grow your business – doesn’t hinge on the competition. You’re not playing a zero-sum game. The market is expansive.

The competition may be kicking your butt, but who’s fault is that? Yep, it’s your fault.

You won’t win by focusing on them. You’ll win by focusing on the customer. If Amazon hasn’t proven the value of that to you, then nothing will. Since day 1 Amazon has focused on the shopper.

I’m challenging you to lean hard into accepting a point of view that may be new to you. Or not. The pie or cake can be enlarged. Competition isn’t keeping you from getting your share. You’re keeping yourself from getting it. You’re failing the customer so the customer is voting with their money to go elsewhere. Don’t get mad with the competition. Or your customers. Instead, make up your mind that this is your company and you’re going to accept the blame. Then, you can jump into your fire suit and start fighting the fire like you know you should. You’re not a victim of this fire. You’re the person armed with the authority to extinguish it. So get busy!

Be well. Do good. Grow great!

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The CEO makes an admission. Maybe a declaration. Maybe a regret. I’m not sure.

“We know what to do, but it’s virtually impossible for us to do it.”

When asked about the constraint, or hurdle for getting it done he begins to lament all the difficulties. He mentions all the senseless meetings where debates rage over inane things, agendas that don’t matter and a million other things people deem important, if not urgent. But in his mind, the waste in the system is stifling activities better spent doing what needs to be done.

To be fair he’s talking about revolutionary things. And that’s what amazes me. That these things are indeed revolutionary. That so many businesses are operating knowing they can do things differently. Better.

But they simply can’t tell the truth or act on it.

They’re stuck. Industry assumptions. Corporate assumptions. Embracing past successes. Fear of present or future threats. On and on it goes. Thinking and feelings based on many things other than the present truth.

Back in Daily Brief number 95 I talked about candor and the need for it. It’s honest sincerity. Simply put, it’s TRUTH.

Leaders, especially political leaders, may lament that they’re unable to tell the absolute truth because nobody would vote for them if they did. They might claim nobody wants to hear the truth.

Truth is difficult, but it’s not impossible. It’s not impossible to tell it. It’s not impossible to act on it. Why else tell it if you can’t or won’t act on it?

Delusion Isn’t A Better Option

Business owners, like any other group of people, including CEO’s, can find solace in embracing unreasonable assumptions. The biggest assumption may be that they must do what others do, the way others do it. Safety in numbers and all that!

But there is no safety in numbers. We’re fooled into thinking so.

We’re also fooled into thinking we must follow “best practices.” This is the one that chaps my hide because it’s so despicable to our innovation and creativity. It sticks us, mires us in the mud of false assumptions, conclusions and perspectives.

During my years of retailing, there was a dominant question asked every Monday morning among retailing cohorts. “How was foot traffic this weekend?” Or, “How were sales this weekend?”

What would follow would be a litany of excuses if sales weren’t great. Retailers worldwide are notorious for blaming everything from the weather to other local events that stole the interest that weekend, to flu outbreaks and anything else that MIGHT explain our poor outcome. Truth? Not really. More likely excuses because it absolves us of the responsibility. It couldn’t be us. It must be some other external influence beyond our control. That’s what makes the failure of truth so damaging.

Truth Telling Doesn’t Require Harshness

Somewhere along the line, I’m unsure where or how it started, we began to think that truth-telling required some bluntness that is offensive. Like a friend wearing an ugly sweater who asks, “How do you like my sweater?” — we feel there’s often just no way we can tell the truth. I don’t think we’re thinking that through though. I mean, what answers could we give to our ugly-sweater-wearing friend? We just get taken off guard so most people probably choose to lie. “Sure, it’s nice.” But we could easily tell the truth and not be hurtful.

“Does it matter how much I like it? It’s your sweater and you’re wearing it. I’d ask you, how well do you like it?”

“It’s not my style, but I don’t often wear sweaters anyway.”

“Do I look like a fashion critic? Don’t ask me.”

I could personally offer any of those responses and they’d each be truthful. It’s a stupid illustration, but that’s the point. We frequently find it difficult to tell the truth even in stupid, simple occasions like a friend wearing an ugly sweater. Imagine the difficulty when our business is on the line. Or when we’re battling through some particularly challenging business problem.

Telling the truth is not the same as telling everything you know. Truth-telling doesn’t mean you abandon discretion or even secrecy when it’s necessary. It just means you behave (and speak) honestly.

Truth-telling has another perspective. It’s the truth you desperately need to hear from others. Most notably your team members.

Make it safe for others to tell you the truth.

You don’t demand the truth. You foster it. You show deep appreciation and gratitude for it. It shows. Everybody can sense it, feel it and see it.

So watch yourself. Be sure you’re not saying one thing, but behaving differently. Don’t say you want the truth, then get snappy when you hear it. Or show other signs of disapproval. People will quickly clam up to protect themselves.

Before we wrap up today’s brief let me interject another word for truth that sometimes applies. Evidence. I’m a proponent of evidence-based leadership. And it’s funky coming from a guy like me who is super intuitive. And a guy who leans into intuition. But I don’t see my being intuitive and a proponent of evidence-based leadership is incongruent. Rather, I think they fit rather well together.

Truth and evidence can be synonymous for this discussion. It’s summed up in “how things really are.” Not how we wish things were.

Put it to the test. Whatever it is. Your assumption. Your question. Your answer. Your solution. Your opportunity. Your worry. Your happiness. It doesn’t matter. Dig and search for evidence. The truth.

Then act on it. Make your decisions – better decisions – based on the truth you uncover, discover or learn. Lead the way for others to do the same thing.

Make the sacred cow in your company the TRUTH. Kill the others. All of them. Go all in and behave accordingly. You’ll grow, improve and transform when you do it long enough that it becomes habit (and your culture).

Be well. Do good. Grow great!

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How serious have you been about them? Have you ever done it so well you remember doing it? Or…

Do you give it just a quick drive-by?

Be honest.

Mostly, we’re too busy living to do much of either one – counting blessings or giving thanks.

Let’s get to the real crux of it. How serious have you been about what you lack? How often do you complain about the government, or government-related stuff like paying taxes, or regulations? How often do you get privately angry at vendors or other business partners?

Mostly, we’re too busy focusing on what we don’t have or what we wish would go away. Where’s the time for counting blessings or giving thanks?

Answer: We don’t take the time to do the right things to help ourselves grow great because quite often we’re too busy doing the wrong things to help ourselves feel better in the short term. Complaining and getting angry fuel our short-term satisfaction. So much so, we find it very difficult to hit the eject button the hampster wheel.

Optimism or pessimism isn’t hard-wired. Pessimists enjoy fooling themselves into thinking it is. It plays into our notion that some folks are just luckier than others. It gives us an easy excuse, allowing us to avoid accountability.

Optimists know life – all of life – is a choice. We decide. We act. We behave. But even optimists can have moments of pessimism during times when we’d rather avoid responsibility and blame others.

All this plays into our sense of gratitude, our ability and willingness to count our blessings while simultaneously giving thanks for them.

Tomorrow is Thanksgiving Day here in America. It’s a day when family and friends get together, eat way too much, watch a little bit of football and kick off the holiday season.

The path to a brighter future hinges on our personal responsibility. I believe a major part of our personal responsibility is our obligation to ourselves, to others and to God is to embrace optimism through gratitude. And in reverse order: God first, others second, and ourselves third.

Start By Taking Just 15 Minutes A Day

I believe in small bite-sized approaches. At least at the beginning. To get started.

Quieten your mind. However best you’re able.

Then, roll through the blessings to discover THE blessing for which you’re most thankful. Admittedly, it’s going to be challenging, but it’ll force you to quickly catalog the blessings as you search for the one you’re most thankful for.

It won’t matter if you get that top spot filled accurately at first. After you get the first one, then go searching through the list for the next most important one.

This is your list so you get to decide for yourself. You may find that as you’re looking for number two you displace number one with something else. That’s fine. Keep the exercise going for as long as you’re able…up to 10 minutes. Two-thirds of the 15 minutes.

Devote the final third of the time to giving thanks for however far you got with your list of blessings. Do that in whatever way suits you best. Me? I pray and give God the thanks.

Reflection After The Fact

Counting blessings and giving thanks won’t likely sit idly by satisfied with their 15 minutes of daily fame. They’ll wrestle your mind to the ground for greater attention. Give it to them. Your surrender to them will fuel growth. Your growth!

It’s not important that you dedicate more time to the 15-minute exercise because you’re going to reflect on them throughout the day. What is important is that you not ignore the urge. Don’t suppress thinking about them again. And again. And again. Instead, embrace thinking about them whenever they emerge. That’ll help you own them. It’ll also improve your gratitude.

Your Smallness.

Counting your blessings isn’t a contest. The blessings or lack of in other lives is of no consequence to your life. Finding or examining somebody who has a blessing you feel is lacking in your life has no bearing on your life. None. Well, actually it has a tremendous bearing on you if you view life through that lens because it will foster jealousy, envy, and bitterness. Stop that nonsense. It won’t just stunt your growth, it’ll kill you from the inside out.

Arrogance. Selfishness. Pride.

They feed our desire to be larger. Larger than we really are. Giving us a wrong-headed sense of self-importance.

By contrast, our devotion to being a blessing counter and giver of thanks shows us our smallness. Not our insignificance because we’ve all got that. We all matter. But these honorable actions persuade us to learn and understand that we’re uniquely who we are, but we’re not inherently better than anybody else.

There are currently 7.7 billion people on the planet. I’m religious. I believe in God and the Bible. That means, I believe we have a soul that will live forever after this life. Somewhere. And it’s up to us to decide where based on how we live here. In light of that view, there is no ranking of all these people. Meaning, nobody is number 1 and nobody is number 7.7 billion. Or anywhere in between. Our inherent worth is equally high. Each of us.

That makes me small enough to give grace to others. In my personal scheme, the number two on my list. God first. Others second. I’m third. My smallness serves me, preventing me from thinking too much of myself. From thinking I’m better than somebody else. From wrongly, too harshly judging others.

Your Bigness.

Counting your blessings. Giving thanks. They generate in us the realization that we can make a difference. Not some philosophical “change the world” kind of a difference, but a very practical positive difference.

One day, an old man was walking along a beach that was littered with thousands of starfish that had been washed ashore by the high tide. As he walked he came upon a young boy who was eagerly throwing the starfish back into the ocean, one by one.

Puzzled, the man looked at the boy and asked what he was doing. Without looking up from his task, the boy simply replied, “I’m saving these starfish, Sir”.

The old man chuckled aloud, “Son, there are thousands of starfish and only one of you. What difference can you make?”

The boy picked up a starfish, gently tossed it into the water and turning to the man, said, “I made a difference to that one!”

I love that parable. For its brevity. For its powerful truth. That we’re all big enough. As big as we need to be to make a positive difference in the world. Our little part of the world. Our slightly larger part of the world perhaps. Who knows? Our service to others is like a ripple of the ocean. Who knows how large a wave it *may* create?

Thank You!

Here, on the eve of a day we’ve set aside in America to give thanks…I want to thank you. For letting me enter your earbuds however often you listen. For allowing me to share whatever insights I’ve been fortunate to learn (part of my list of blessings includes the array of people who have graced my life with a positive presence and helped make me who I am).

Thank you for letting me pass along almost 4 decades of leadership living so you can build on it as you wish. I hope this podcast is serving you well as a catalyst for figuring it out for yourself. Whatever it may be.

Tomorrow will be a special day for many people in our country. For others, it may be no different than any other. My hope and wish for you – for all of us – is that it will become a daily ritual in our lives to give us perspective and insight that will serve to make us better. An impetus for our own growth, improvement, and transformation. That by counting our blessings and being thankful for them…that individually and collectively we’ll take our lives more seriously. Consider more soberly the choices we’re making. Determine it may be time to fix what ails us, and get on with strengthening ourselves by straightening out the kinks, shoring up the weaknesses, building even stronger the strengths and living lives worthy of influencing others in all the best ways.

Be well. Do good. Grow great!

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I did a 5-part summary of the book – The Third Opinion: How Successful Leaders Use Outside Insight To Create Superior Results by Saj-Nicole A. Joni, PhD. You can find each episode here:

Part 1
Part 2
Part 3
Part 4
Part 5

Three years of research by the author has led to two insights that form the heart of this book:

Insight 1: Leadership today requires 3 new habits: the habit of the mind, habit of relationship and habit of focus.

Insight 2: You can start developing the three habits and your advisory network at any time during your career.

One: Habit of mind

Leaders must master a new way of thinking. Joni calls this “exponential thinking.” It allows you to see all sides of a complex issue. Exponential thinking is best done with others. This kind of thinking plays an important role in decisions where there is high ambiguity, uncertainty, and risk.

Exponential thinking is required at all levels today, not just the C-suite.

Two: Habit of relationship

Leaders today must assemble a new kind of leadership team, one that ensures they undertake the right kind of exploratory thinking. One that challenges perspectives.

Leaders need external thinking partners so they explore sensitive and edgy issues with high trust and external perspective. These are compartmentalized roles necessarily. A person can play different roles. For instance, one person might move from subject expert to thinking partner and sometimes to action team member at different times depending on the circumstances, expertise and interest. Your ability to get results in increasingly boundaryless organizations depends on how well you can orchestrate your network of important relationships.

Three: Habit of focus

Leaders must have the skill and discipline to focus on the essential non-urgent issues. Leaders today face information overload and increased demands for speed. More and more daily work has become urgent. But just getting daily work isn’t what your leadership is about. Leaders must be able to create and execute strategies to carry out their leadership agendas.

Mastery of the habit of focus is being able to function effectively in your high-pressure environment and make progress on the big, longer-term issues that need your attention. Your sustained focus on the non-urgent important issues is ultimately what will define your leadership. It’s what differentiates your unique contributions and ability to deliver value no one else can.

Insight 2 is that anybody can develop these three habits at any time. But it’s important to develop these habits in concert. Everybody will use each habit differently, but there are guidelines to help you focus on perfecting the various parts of each habit as your leadership progresses.

Where do today’s business leaders turn for outside insight to help them?

Rather than prescribe a 1-size-fits-all approach, I think we can think about the answer in two general areas: informal circles or associations and formal circles or associations. Today I want to nudge you to think of both informal and formal circles in light of being purposeful and intentional. We can all improve our lives, including our personal and professional growth, with more deliberate activity to make sure we improve our circles.

Why The Third Opinion Matters

We’re familiar with the proverbial second opinion, mostly associated with healthcare. We go to a doctor because we’re unsure what’s wrong with us. The doctor runs a battery of test and tells us he’s not sure exactly what’s wrong, but he makes an educated guess. Rather than proceed with that doctor, we opt to visit another doctor who also runs a battery of his own test. Maybe he, too tells he’s unsure of what’s wrong, but he surmises it’s something different than the first doctor. That’s a quandary.

Maybe we choose to trust the doctor who gave us the most favorable diagnosis. Maybe we do just the opposite and trust the doctor with the worst diagnosis. Or, maybe we choose to visit a third doctor.

I suspect second opinions are mostly sought to confirm the first opinion. But what do we do if the two opinions are completely different? If we’re wise, we keep looking for answers, or congruent conclusions.

Ms. Joni’s book reveals how we all tend to get a first opinion from people closest to us, then we likely get a second opinion from others, either inside or outside our company. But she puts forth a strong argument for a third opinion. One that is sought from a more intentional group of advisors who can serve us. She argues that when business leaders avail themselves of such a resource they hardly ever go back to a life without a third opinion. And for good reason. It’s simply too effective and powerful.

It Doesn’t Matter Unless You’d Like To Grow

Decision making is important for every leader. As a business owner or executive, you’re focused daily on making better decisions. And making them faster. But that’s just one aspect, albeit a very critical part of your life.

The bigger reason is growth. Your personal and professional growth!

That’s why my over-reaching objective and mission is to evangelize this message that who we surround ourselves with matters. And we should be much more intentional and purposeful about it.

That doesn’t mean we operate in that domain 100% of the time because that’s impractical. For instance, your family is your family. I hope they’re perfectly nice, supportive people. But that doesn’t mean they always help you grow. If you’re like most of us with a loving, supportive family, they likely sympathize with us, encourage us, offer us some correction (hopefully when need it most), but it’s unlikely they challenge us in the best ways to grow, improve or transform. They’re likely too close to us to do that for us. The context of our relationship and our history with them likely prohibit an opportunity for enough perspective to serve us like that.

The same could likely be said of close friends and other associations. They’ve all got strings attached. A context that makes it all but impossible to have an opinion or perspective that serves us simply because they’re determined to help us grow, improve and transform. These informal relationships have another agenda, likely an agenda that’s perfectly fine and acceptable. They want us to still love them, keep them employed, like them, be friends with them and many other positive outcomes. Hopefully positive outcomes for both of us. But it doesn’t always happen.

This third opinion – this very intentional opinion we seek – is valuable to our growth. It’s not always comfortable – in fact, it’s often uncomfortable because that’s how all growth happens. But don’t confuse being uncomfortable with being unsafe or feeling threatened. When it’s done properly, figuring out how to take advantage of a third opinion delivers superior opportunities for our personal and professional growth because it’s secure, safe and confidential. That’s a remarkable opportunity that very few CEOs and leaders have ever experienced. Those who do demonstrate an elevated performance uncommon to others.

Your business could be a one-man band, but it’s more likley you operate a business that depends on a team of people. What you’re able to do with this team of people – people you’ve intentional surrounded yourself with – is likely significantly better than what you could ever hope to do alone. That’s how it works when you’re looking for perspectives you may have yet to consider. It’s not about finding somebody with whom you can agree…it’s all about growth so you can figure out for yourself what may best serve YOU. It’s driven entirely by your aim to grow.

Besides, why else would you be listening to a podcast called “Grow Great?”

Be well. Do good. Grow great!

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On Monday night, October 29th, some Senators NHL hockey players were taking an Uber ride in Phoenix. The driver’s onboard video captured the conversation of the players mocking how poorly they’re being coached. The driver pushed the video to YouTube and that’s when the trouble began. For starters, this father of 6 was fired by Uber. The players scrambled into “damage control” mode to backtrack. Too late. The damage was done.

A private conversation that went public – and viral – proved that employees, even professional athletes, often see their leaders and companies in a different light than management likely wants. The truth hurts. And when it’s delivered unexpectedly and outside of a safe environment, it can cause harm. But…

That shouldn’t be the case! Ever.

But I realize that’s impractical and unreasonable. Even so, I know it can be drastically improved.

Leaders think and feel one way, but so often employees think and feel very different. The first question is…

Do you care what your employees think? Does it matter to you how they feel?

Let’s think about it. What difference does it make? Well, let me ask you if it matters to you how you think and feel about anything? Can you just do whatever needs to be done, or whatever you’re told needs to be done without letting your thoughts and feelings interfere in any way?

I guess that’s possible if you’re a mindless doofus, but I’m fairly confident you’re not intentionally trying to build a team like that. You know the answer. Thoughts and feelings impact everything we do, every single day! You, me…everybody. Including your team.

Armed with that truth, we can conclude that the thoughts and feeling of our team members matters. Not because we’re touchy-feely business owners, but because it matters to performance. I’d add my 2 cents here, since this is my podcast, it’s also the right thing to do – to care about your team members enough as people to give due consideration to their thoughts and feelings.

What is due consideration?

It’s not an escape hatch for us to slide through so we can justify our tyrannical leadership, but it is an honest viewpoint that recognizes leadership has a perspective that isn’t always aligned with every segment of our team. Fact is, we see things and know things they don’t.

For years I coached hockey – particularly inline or roller hockey. Whether the players were 8 or 18, as a coach I could see things the players simply couldn’t see. But they could see things I couldn’t see.

For them, the game was primarily a series of 1-on-1 play. That is, they were either defending the player in the front of them (or things went badly, behind them) OR they were attacking (a term of offensive play meaning our team had the puck) the player in front of them.

For me, the game was primarily macro – meaning I was looking at the overall position and strategy. They saw things up close. I saw things more zoomed out. Together, if we had the talent/skill and an accurate perspective, then we could compile a winning strategy.

My job as the coach was to put the players, individually and collectively, in the best position possible for success. That included a game plan that would allow them to play a winning game. It was up to them to execute that game plan. But first, they had to believe what I believed – this is our best opportunity to win. I needed them to always deeply believe in what I was asking them to do. Mostly, they did and my teams enjoyed success because of it.

Professional hockey players who make millions of dollars need the same thing. Your employees do, too. They need to believe that leadership is putting them in the best position possible for success, both at the individual level and at the team (or company) level. If they don’t, we’ve failed as leaders.

Those Ottowa Senator players clearly don’t feel that way about their head coach. They can apologize all they want for what they said on that Uber ride, but I don’t think they should. Should have they shot their mouths off in public like that. Who cares? I think by doing it they gave their head coach a gift. The TRUTH.

“You can’t handle the truth.” It’s a famous line uttered by Jack Nicholson in the movie, A Few Good Men.

As business owners and leaders, it’s our role to find, figure out and handle the truth. To see things for what they truly are, not how we wish they were. To figure out ways to better handle the truth. To devise and implement strategies that will best serve the purpose and mission of our companies. But there’s more.

It’s also our role to help each team member see where they fit. Some years ago I began to do some work with clients around this notion of an individual team member who desperately wants to know, “How do I fit in?” Not socially, but in reality. How does this team member as a person, with the contributions they’re able to make and the ones we’re asking them to make – how do they fit in and make a positive difference?

Like those hockey players in that Uber ride, you may have team members who don’t believe in what you’re doing. They may not understand what you’re doing. Or why.

Maybe they no idea what you expect them to do, or how you expect them to do it.

People can be filled with questions and emotions around things that are so fundamental, but we neglect them because as leaders we either don’t know or we don’t care. So first, start caring (if you’re not already). Care what your people think and feel because it’s good business (and it’s the right thing to do).

Next, find out what they think and how they feel. Understand their viewpoint. See what they see before you impose on them what you see.

I’ve never been a hockey player. I’ve been a hockey coach for years though. I’ve studied it more hours that I care to admit. Spent years talking with coaches around the world. Learning. Because first I was a fan. Interested in the nuances of the sport. Talking with amateur and professional players, coupled with my study, I learned a lot about the game. And what it takes to win.

The micro level of the game – the details at the player level – had to come from the players. Years ago I realized as both a business leader and a hockey coach that they weren’t much different. The perspective of the person doing the work (the player) is important. They think what they think. They feel what they feel. My job was never to convince them otherwise, but first to understand it. THIS IS WHERE MANY LEADERS FAIL.

The Senator’s head coach is failing to do this. Like many leaders who view things in a classical hierarchical environment – I’m the boss, do what I say – he’s neglected to gain the insights of his players. It doesn’t mean you have to agree with them. It means you must try to understand them.

Then, digest them. Don’t immediately go into sales mode of your ideas, thoughts and feeling. That’ll just signal your team a very bad message, “No matter how you feel or think, I’m going to impose on you how I think and feel.” Open your eyes and ears. Listen and learn. Understand.

Think about the best ways to help your team – both individually and collectively – understand what you’re asking them to do. Begin by answering the question on everybody’s mind, “Why?” Don’t wait for them to ask. Explain to them why you’re doing what you’re doing. Help them understand their contribution and why it matters so much.

Some team members are more compliant than others. I realize we can have employees who are contrarians. Some aren’t going to understand no matter what you do. It’s a topic for another day, but I’m going to tell you to get rid of the chronic contrarians. I’m NOT talking about the person who doesn’t agree with you, or the person who may be difficult to convert. I’m talking about the person who always lacks an open mind. They will never see what you see, or understand it because they refuse. These are toxic employees who will kill your quest for a high performing culture.

One team member at a time. That’s where it begins. We’ve talked about it before, but you have to figure out a way to scale the human talent on your roster. Every coach or leader must do the same thing. Find out how they feel. Find out what they think. Communicate that you understand. Make sure you understand them accurately. And make sure they understand how much you care about them and their contribution, then make certain they believe that your direction and leadership is capable of winning.

Be well. Do good. Grow great!

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You didn’t think you’d hear from me today, did you? Well, in the words of Gomer Pyle, “Surprise! Surprise! Surprise!”

Let’s talk about delighting customers. By now you know me well enough to know how fanatical I am about customer service or experience. I use words like extraordinary, remarkable and verbs like dazzle and delight.

Companies talk about it because talk is easy. Execution is hard. Doable, but hard.

Unfortunately, companies can be lulled into thinking they’re doing a good job when they’re not. Just say it and believe it. That’s enough.

Well, to be fair it used to be enough. But the Internet changed all that. Now, people can publish and talk. Word of mouth used to mean you bought a new car, took it home and told your neighbors where not to go buy a car. Because your experience was awful. The car? She’s great. But the dealer where we got it, not so much. That was our word of mouth. That was then.

Now, we go home, aim our phone’s camera at our face while we show off our car’s interior. Then we turn the camera on the outside of the car as we offer a review to anybody interested in this particular model. We share our dealership experience in the video. For good or bad. And we post it on YouTube, Facebook and as an Instagram story. We also figure we’ll post a review at the dealer’s Google profile, giving them 2 stars. “The paperwork took us 4 hours! Four stinking hours just to get out of the door with our new car. Don’t shop here unless you’re craving the need to feel like a hostage.”

That’s our word of mouth today. Companies have no place to hide today. The worldwide web exposes us. All of us.

I know what you’re thinking. How can our company possibly meet the expectations of today’s customers? How do we protect ourselves against the unreasonable client who refuses to think we’re giving it our best? Answer: you can’t. Jerks are going to be jerks.

Surprise! Surprise! Surprise! You can’t let the jerks dictate how you roll. So because you can’t dazzle 100% of the people you’re not going to bust your tail trying? That’s a bad business model. Lean into it. Make up your mind that even if the jerks write a bad review of your company, you’re going to remain devoted to doing the right thing – delighting every customer!

Make up your mind. Decide.

That’s the real key to delighting customers! And no, it’s not easy to decide.

Have you ever found it hard to forgive somebody, but you eventually relented and did forgive them? You just wallered it and wallered it, refusing to give in. You told yourself how undeserving they are of your forgiveness. You justified it 8 ways to Sunday. You fortified yourself, entrenching yourself more and more into your position of not forgiving them. Until you realized you were working a lot harder not to forgive them than you would if you just let go and made up your mind, “I’m going to forgive them and move on.” In an instant you did it. Something clicked inside of you and caused you to at long last decide to forgive. That gave rise to other actions that likely served you well. Much better than holding onto the grudge or whatever else you were feeling.

That’s how it works with delighting customers. Fret about all the downsides. Find every excuse for neglecting to do it. Justify it with spreadsheets and all the perceived outcomes you can imagine. You’ll devote more effort into being poor or mediocre at serving customers than you will at rising above the crowd and living in the Land of Delight!

Over deliver. Under promise. Manage the expectations. That’s what we’ve all heard. Forget it. It’s not that complicated.

I’ll shock you with a really simple truth. Politeness alone will put you above the crowd. Having people who say “please” and “thank you,” or “sir” and “ma’am” is a competitive edge. Mere politeness involves more than just words though. Mostly, it involves attentiveness. Walk up to a cashier in a store where somebody is anxious to help you right away. I’ll be behind you with a crash cart to resuscitate you when you faint in shock if they immediately pay attention to you. We’re all too well acquainted with pathetic and indifferent service.

Are you telling me that it demands greater effort to be attentive than it does to be indifferent? Does it take more effort and time to great a customer with “Good afternoon. Welcome!” – than it does to say, “Can I help you?” (drives me completely crazy, but that’s because I ran retail companies for too long)

Attentiveness. Politeness. Surprise! Surprise! Surprise! You can delight customers.

Honesty. Directness. I talked about those yesterday. For good reason. Those are also delightful to customers. We appreciate it, even if it’s not exactly what we wanted to hear. It beats being lied to. Or surprised in a bad way down the line. “Surprise! I told you we’d have that project completed this week, but I was wrong. It’s gonna be done in 2 weeks!” That’s not delightful. To anybody. Including us. I haven’t met anybody yet who enjoys delivering bad news, especially when it involves them telling somebody they can’t do what they promised.

“It’ll cost too much.” Sometimes a CEO or entrepreneur worry that the cost of delighting customers will be too high. This admittedly happens when we’re operating companies that aren’t at the top of the price point. People operating on price and or convenience can find it hard to get their head wrapped around. It’s easy for Uber or Walmart or Amazon. They’ve got scale working for them. Or so goes the logic. And I immediately jump in – “Well, you can’t successfully scale negative profits. So how do you suppose that works?”

It’s that proverbial story of the guy selling watermelons at a loss. He buys them for $2, but sells them for $1. “How do you make a living?” asks a stranger. He replies, “I make it up in volume.” The math doesn’t work.

Here’s the math that does work. Delighting customers pays. Always.

Doing the right thing pays. Always.

Will it cost you? Yes. It may cost you in profits on a single transaction. It may cost you in a variety of ways. But it scales because delighting customers is a way of life that generates more business that won’t cost you. Measure the transactions one at a time and they’re not all going to cost you. Put the effort into having processes and systems designed to dazzle and delight EVERY SINGLE CUSTOMER. Make delighting customers the norm inside your company. You won’t “take it in the shorts” as one CEO told me, lamenting how his company had to take care of a client who had a bad experience. Will you have to forego profits every now and again? Absolutely. Because if you don’t, you won’t delight the customer.

But I’ve got another surprise for you.

The Power Of Recovery

Recovery is what happens when you take an unhappy customer from disgust (or potential disgust) to delight. It’s a great opportunity. I love recovery opportunities! They’re terrific for shoring up your customer base. There is no better opportunity for building a foundation for a successful business.

Examine transactions and insist on each transaction earning its keep…you’ll lose.

See an opportunity to make an unhappy customer delighted and do whatever you can to surprise the customer with your willingness to dazzle them — and watch the shock and awe they’ll feel.

That word of mouth that happens in this digital age is more than worth the cost, or the profits you’ll forego. Delighted customers can’t wait to share their story. Give them something to talk about. It’s the fast path to growing great!

Be well. Do good. Grow great!