Connections come from being able to relate, communicate and understand each other. Sometimes it happens effortlessly. Other times we have to really strain to make it happen. Then, there are those occasions where it’s just not going to happen…unless we intervene and do something constructively.
Salespeople have to be willing to go the extra mile for it…or risk losing all hope of creating a customer. Rapport building is a skill. It can be learned. Don’t spend all your time learning about your product or service. Rarely do we decide to do business with people who have the most product knowledge. We do business with people we can relate to well, people who understand us and people we feel we understand. It all leads to like-ability – rapport. You know the definition of rapport, don’t you?
Lots of people talk too much. Even me. Sometimes. Actually, too often. It’s not a bad trait if you produce videos and podcasts. It’s a terrible trait if you want to succeed in sales.
I was in sales long before I was in podcasting, or videocasting. Or blogging. I grew up selling, but it wasn’t because I enjoyed talking. It was because I was hungry for money, and I was curiously interested.
I quickly discovered I had the ingredients necessary for sales. Like every novice, when I began I had to learn, practice and improve. One of the first lessons I learned was to shut up and listen. Even though I learned it well, I still sometimes forget.
We want others to feel this way toward us. Well, at least we want some people to feel this way toward us.
A young lady wants the handsome prince to come take her away to the life of her dreams. Some young ladies are stuck with not-so-handsome, beneath-royalty bald guys with low voices. At least one of them is. I didn’t start out that way. At least not the bald part.
Tomorrow is Valentine’s Day. Not that I really care. My wife doesn’t even care…much. This video isn’t the result of a day where men buy their women more roses and chocolates than any other day. It’s not even the result of over 34 years of marriage.
Two specific things have bubbled these ideas to the top of my usually empty brain.
a) Too many marriages that aren’t what they should be. Sadly, I know too many.
b) My own realization that there was a time when with great anticipation I’d plan a weekend trip to just spend a few precious hours with a girl I loved. Friday would arrive. I’d go to class, then go to work. I’d work until 6pm or so, then drive 11 hours one-way through the night arriving around 6am to a little street in Ft. Worth where she lived. Without sleep I’d relish the few hours we had together. After attending church services on Sunday morning we’d grab a quick bite to eat and down the road I’d go, another 11 hours back home. Eleven sad hours. Horrible drives filled with memories of mere moments together. Thinking to myself, “I’m spending more time driving to her and away from her than I am WITH her.” About 2 miles down the road I’d begin planning my next visit. Such was life for about 3 years until at last I married her and brought her home. We’ve been together now for almost 70% of our lives. With each passing year, that percentage increases. Now there’s a thought, huh?
I love her very much. I’m still the young man driving an orange hot rod 11 hours one-way determined to get to her. I’m older. Wider. With less hair. And my car now has 4 cylinders, not 8. No, it’s not orange. I wish. But it’s faster than Sundance (my 1972 orange one). As you get older you need more speed – because you’ve got less time. Which is why it’s silver. Greater speed requires more stealth.
I realize the level of passion felt by young love is difficult, if not impossible to maintain. Life happens. We get in a groove. We grow older. If we’re blessed, we grow old. We enter a comfort zone. Me? I’m trying to grow more than just old.
I’m growing increasingly committed to reversing the groove where I more diligently honor our time together. For me, it’s an objective and goal of life. To be a man worthy of her admiration and adoration. I suspect she needs it. I know I do. And I believe every man should behave in ways worthy of it…because we all know, it’s what we need most!
